How many years has it been?
It has been 10 years since my divorce from the boys father.
10 years folks.
10 years of fighting to get child support.
10 years of trying to get them to take action on his case.
Well, after 10 years of trying to force him to pay, they took away his drivers license.
Aren't you thrilled?
I know I am.
I mean, what the fucking hell took so long?
10 fucking years State of Maine!
What is your deal?
In the 10 years that they have been piddling around trying to get him to pay and trying to figure out ways to make him pay, this option, of license revocation has always been there. Gov. Angus King put it into play 9 years ago.
How do I know?
Because I was one of 5 moms selected to go to meet him and talk to him about child support enforcement laws.
This was an idea he and I talked about. Taking away licenses for driving, fishing, hunting etc.
They just took it away on March 4, 2004.
The divorce went final on February 2, 1994.
That is 10 years of waiting for them to go after him and make him pay.
10 years of waiting for them to do something.
Do I think this will have an impact on him?
Do I think loss of driving will somehow wake him up and make him pay his child support?
No.
No I don't.
This action, along with any other actions, should have been done years ago.
You can't just let guys like my ex get off scott free for 10 fucking years and suddenly expect them to start paying cuz you took away their license.
No, they will drive anyway or get other people to drive. They have ways around paying in case you didn't notice.
Filed under ex-bastard.
Comments
Whoa!!
Don't they have it where they deduct it straight from his wages?
I'm sorry, I'm not fully up to speed with what's happened, but I'm glad you're making some progress.
Posted by: Keanuette | March 8, 2004 4:18 PM
Oh Nettie, the saga of my ex and his not paying child support borders on legendary. I am glad they took it away finally but like I said, it took 10 years to do it. That's a shame considering for 10 years the kids have needed new shoes, clothes, school supplies etc etc etc. By the time he actually pays what he owes, he will owe them at least $100,000.00 dollars.
Posted by: kat | March 8, 2004 4:21 PM
Why is he an ex-bastard?
Doesn't the cap still fit?
Posted by: Keanuette | March 8, 2004 6:33 PM
He is my ex-husband and his nickname is ex-bastard.
Language barrier here. I don't know what you mean by the cap still fitting..
Posted by: kat | March 8, 2004 6:47 PM
Meaning, drop the 'ex'....;)
Posted by: Keanuette | March 8, 2004 6:54 PM
Aha! I get it now. I could drop the ex but there is only one ex bastard but I know a lot of bastards so I don't want the categories to get confused...lol
Posted by: kat | March 8, 2004 6:56 PM
You know, I agree. With those kinds of guys, there is really nothing that the courts can do to make them pay, not even jailtime. They are just derilecs (sp?) who have no sense of responsibility. I know too. I am glad there has been some kind of retribution though...
Posted by: Faye | March 8, 2004 10:14 PM
I'm glad too Faye but it's still such a long process to get anything done. Thanks for the comment. :)
Posted by: kat | March 8, 2004 10:31 PM
That sucks, I have to attach my ex's wages but I can't complain, he's been good about paying. I"m sorry you have to fight for this. Its not easy raising kids alone and its sad that not everyone supports their kids. I mean, it your KIDS, how can you not?
Posted by: Mookie | March 10, 2004 4:14 AM
You don't know my ex. It is soooo easy for him to just walk away. I often wonder how he sleeps at night knowing he has 5 kids and he's not taking care of any of them.
Posted by: kat | March 10, 2004 6:04 AM
UNfourtunately you have no idea who i am and never will. I have never met you, and you dont know me. It seems you girls have quite the club going on here. Anyways- unbeknownst to you- i know your ex. Not only do i know him.. but obviously better than you(kat). Have you ever considered getting over it? I realise you have bills to pay.. I know that your "ex" cares very much for his children, and loves them very much. Also- you think taking his drivers license away solves any problems? How is he supposed to get to work is he does not have a car? Im sure you know how hard it is to have to be carted around everywhere. How about getting some conseling or something..? I think it would help you better than complaining about your poor terrible life on your site so that people with your same opinions can complain right back.. I am saying this in deffense of your ex.. not to get on your case.. but if you have friends you would do anything for you will understand. Humiliating him and degrading him on your dumb site will get you nowhere but uncool. Also- he is not a damn rock-star...he does not have millions of dollars to spend on random crap. He is not a drunk, not a drug addict, he is not a criminal,not a compulsive shopper....He is having trouble making ends meet.. as i am sure you are too. I would think that having been married to him at one point.. and having kids with him you'd know he is a passionate man. UNfourtunately you did not help his self-esteem very much. This is not a threat- i am not downing you- i do not know you. I am stating my opinion. I hope you can take it as constructive critisism. - yltk
Posted by: you'dliketoknow | April 12, 2004 9:22 PM
Hey asshat, once again, no balls to use a real name and email addy but I'll ignore that for now, coward. You seem to think this is about me being in love with him. Me still wanting him. I don't want him. I haven't loved or wanted him in 10 fucking years. This is about his kids. This is about his oldest child, the one named after him. This is about 2 sons knowing their father as a man who loves them.
Does he send them a card? Does he call them? Does he do anything for them?
And just what do you think he said to his name sake when we were there just 3 years ago? He said and I quote for you so you can remind him, "I'm sorry I can't be a dad right now, my band is more important."
I picked up the pieces of his sons broken heart that day. I pick it up with every holiday, every birthday that goes by and no phone call, no letter, no nothing.
How does his son know what his father is up to? He goes to the bands website to find out.
Don't you dare tell me that thing you call a man loves his children.
A real man would call his kids or write them or do something to show he cares. He can work. He just chooses not too just as he has always done. When we were married, I worked and paid the bills and he slept all day and partied all night.
Were you there?
Were you part of my marriage to him? Did you know the details of everything we did?
No you fucking didn't.
Why don't you talk to his kids, ask them if they know if their "daddy" loves them. They will be honest about it and tell you just how many years it's been since daddy said I love you.
Posted by: Kat | April 12, 2004 9:49 PM
If it is so important to you.. why did you go to florida? Why are you not closer to him so he can see his kids? Why dont you make it easy for him to be there? I did not have my dad growing up.. why? Because my mom downed him.. said horrible things about him. i grew up thinking my dad was a jerk.. i did not see him...why? because my mom would not allow it.. because of personal problems with him- she took it out on him by using us kids. This is not a him and kids issue - it is a you and him issue. Or should i say.. " i think..." What i do know is that he DOES love them...maybe he is scared .. maybe he thinks he has ruined his realtionship with his sons..maybe he thinks they will never forgive him. That is just my opinion. like you said we all have our own opinions.
Posted by: yltk | April 12, 2004 10:07 PM