My Single Mom Life

A few days ago, Jules asked us to talk about our best friends, and I'm just now getting around to it. Sorry Jules.

Shell and I have been friends for ages, I'm not even going to say how many years, but it's been a long, long time.
The state we grew up in, and where Shell still lives, is a cold, boring place, so as teenagers, we all did what a lot of teens do to occupy ourselves.
We caused trouble, drank and partied.
I hung out with a group of people and she hung out with hers. Eventually, groups of people merged together for huge parties, bonfires, keggers. That's how we met, at one of those.
Don't ask for details, I don't remember.
We became fast friends and have remained that way right up till this day, and will be for the rest of our lives. No two people were better meant to be friends.
We've both struggled with our own drug issues over the years and helped each other through them. We helped each other raise our kids when we both ended up as single moms living just a few apartments over from each other. Always right there to lend a hand should the other one need a break.
We shared many dinners together to save on food costs, did each others dishes and household chores, rides, late night talks, you name it, we were right there all the time.
I would babysit for her while she went to college at night, she'd babysit for me so I could get a break.
We were there for each other through relationships that failed, marriages that fell apart, helping each other see the truth about the abusive buttheads in our lives.
We celebrated all the good times together as well. We could party with the best of them.

Shell drove me to the hospital the night Sebastian was born and held my hand, wiped my brow, touched his head when he came out.
At the time, it was the most comforting feeling in the world, and now a source of embarrassment years later for Sebastian, when Shell and I get together and talk about that night. It's amazing how kids find birth stories so icky.
But to us, it was a special moment. My best friend was with me, by my side, while I brought a new person into the world. My mom was also there, another source of torture for the boy. "Oh mom gross! Ninny and Shell touched my head before I was all the way out?!"
Yuppers my boy. Hahaha

Shell and I took a long road trip together, kinda like Thelma and Lousie, without the murders, but with the gun.
Shell had her 9mm with her the whole trip, right in the door pocket. We were armed, had money, and on our own.
We drove from Maine to Florida, to New Orleans, to Nashville, all over the damn south, and then back home again to our kids.
We had a helluva time.
We were "freelance photographers" working for a big named women's magazine, scouting for the next hottest bachelor.
We still have all the pics we took on that trip.
We saw Elvis's house at 3am, hung out with the security guard, signed the gate.
We talked with truckers on cb radio and had an absolute blast.
We learned even more about each other on that trip than we ever knew in the 10 years previous being friends.
There are things about each of us that only the other knows. We've vowed to never tell another soul for as long as we live, but often discuss them together.
I don't think there's another person alive who knows more about me than she does. I've never kept a secret from her, and neither she with me.

When I moved here 10 years ago this coming June, it was one of the hardest decisions I ever made. I was leaving all my family and my best friend behind, never wanting to go back there again.
I do go back to visit from time to time, but I just can't live there anymore. Too damn cold, too many memories.
I know it hurt her, still does, that I'm so far away, but we talk as often as we can, she comes here more than I get up there, but the distance is never going to change who my best friend is.
I've never felt comfortable talking about life with anyone but her.
I really wish when I was up there this past February, that it wasn't as cold as it was, that I had felt better, that I had had more time. We barely had much time to be together, and saying goodbye again was so much more difficult.
I'm hoping she can come down here in October like she's planning, even if it's only a couple of days. I plan on spending that time with her as best I can.
I would have posted pics of us together in this entry, but nah, we both know what the other one looks like, in good times and bad, we've seen each other at our worst and our best.
Besides, the words are the most important. She's the only other person who knows what this friendship, these words, mean.
I miss ya Shell, more than you know.