My Single Mom Life

So I'm sitting here at this late hour, wide awake, surfing, looking at things, snooping around bloggers archives.
I came across a really well written blog, Serving the Queens, and snooped around Jenn's archives for awhile.
It has a very nice design, pretty pictures, but it's the writing in those archived pages that I love the most.

She's so very different than me, but kinda like me too.
Her archives spoke to me.
There was some pain in those pages that reached out to me, and let me let go of some of mine.
The absent father, the people who stand in for him, the questions that will someday be asked by her smallest child.
I know all of those thoughts, I've dealt with them all.
I still deal with them.

And I cried.
For the first time in a long time, I cried over the teens not having a father in their lives.
I read through her pages, her stories about big blue eyes he'll never know, and I cried for all the same things.
All the things the teens father missed out on, all the things he will miss out on.
All the questions I've been left to answer, all the answers I just don't have.

And it's ok.
I've done the very best that I could do, I work hard at this every single day.
I am mother and father, I am friend and confidant.
I am doctor and teacher, and care giver and the one person who loves them most in this entire world.

I know that just as I have survived through all of this, I have a feeling she will.
She writes so beautifully and full of honesty, that I just know she'll get through it all too.