My Single Mom Life

Sorry for the confusion, my birthday is not today, it's tomorrow, March 1st.
I will be 38 years old.
*gasp*
I'm in great company though, some famous people who share my birthday on March 1st are;
7th Heaven actor Adam LaVorgna (1981), "Saved By The Bell" star Mark-Paul Gosselaar (1974), Nickelback guitarist Ryan Peake (1973), hoops star Chris Webber (1973), Spanish actor Javier Bardem (1969), WWE wrestler Booker T (1965), "Eyes" star Tim Daly (1956), prolific actor/director Ron Howard (1954), the real "Daisy Duke," Catherine Bach (1954), Reggae singer Burning Spear (1948), comedian Alan Thicke (1947), actress Lana Wood (1946), "The A-Team" actor Dirk Benedict (1945), The Who singer Roger Daltrey (1944), Cuban guitarist Leo Brouwer (1939), actor Jed Allan (1937), "The Lady in Red" actor Robert Conrad (1935), Calypso singer Harry Belafonte (1927), screen actor David Niven (1910; d. 1983), bandleader Glenn Miller (1904; d. 1944), and early Renaissance painter Sandro Botticelli (1445; d. 1510).

I think though, that 38 will be my last birthday.
I don't want to get any older, so I think I'm just going to stay 38 forever. *wink*

Tomorrow night, my sister and I, the teens, and my nieces, will go do our usual birthday diner at the Oriental Buffet, and maybe something else, then the teens will go to my sister's house for the night, so I can go do something if I want, or just have a night alone.
I think I'll just stay home alone and curl up with some cake or ice cream, and a movie.
I have 30 Days of Night coming from Netflix, so I'll just curl up with my kitties and a scary movie, and enjoy a peaceful night by myself.
Thanks for all the early birthday wishes though!

Posted by Kat at 8:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

For my birthday that is.
I am not sure I want to go out and do anything really, maybe just get a small cake and celebrate at home with the boys and my sis, and the girls.
Sebastian made me an early birthday card, it's pictured below.
He says this isn't the real one, he just wanted me to have something early.

There isn't much at all happening around here today.
I have housework to do, emails to answer, and stuff like that.
I'm mostly just being lazy today though.
Maybe something exciting will happen.
Oh, I do have to go to the post office and mail some stuff.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 10:53 AM | Permalink | Comments (5)

I need a Valium or a really stiff drink.
Or several.

14 years ago on February 4th 1994, we were divorced, custody of the minor children awarded to me, as well as the pitiful child support sum of $21 per week.
Over the last 14 years, he barely paid that amount.
There was a period of 5 years straight, where he paid absolutely nothing at all.
His back due support is in the hundred thousand dollar range.
I tried for years to get the support order modified, but they always said he was unemployed, not paying any taxes, collecting welfare off and on, and had fathered 3 more children.
Then of course we learned about Cameron, who is a year older than my oldest son, Mark, for a total offspring count of 6 children.
Six children he wasn't paying any support for because he was "unemployed".
The state of Maine never looked into his band gigs as income, or the fact that he worked as a tattoo artist for other shops.

Fast forward, he is now the owner of his own tattoo and piercing studio.
This is my ex-husbands business, Coopa Creations.
That is his name on the sign, that is his picture at the top, he is Coopa.
See how it says under his picture, owner and artist?
He owns that shop.
So I filed for modification again.
They served him the legal modification papers at his shop.

On February 16th, I told you that they modified the child support to $67 per week.

Today I received another packet of papers from the state of Maine attorney general's office.
The support has not been modified legally yet, there is going to be a hearing.
He (ex-husband) has until March 7th, 2008, to file a motion against the modification.
I read through the papers, and I wasn't clear on whether or not I would be needed to appear at the hearing in person or by phone.
So I called the AG's office.

I spoke to the AG in charge of my case, she said they had just been discussing this case this morning, and she would be happy to answer any questions I had as best she could.
I asked about whether or not I'd be needed to appear in a Maine courtroom, and if so, I needed plenty of notice to attend because I live here in Florida, I would need to come up with the funds for a plane ticket etc, or if I would be needed to "appear" by phone.
She said she didn't know yet because he has until March 7th to file a counter claim against the modification.
Then I asked why the modified support was so low, $67.
She said it was based on imputed minimum wage.

I said excuse me? Minimum wage? He's a business owner, he is making far more than minimum wage.
She asked me what I was talking about.
I said, the address he was served at, the 114 Main street address, is his business.
Coopa Creations is his business.
He owns that tattoo shop.
He cannot possibly be making minimum wage.
She then said, well he hasn't filed any taxes for several years, was I sure he was the business owner.
I said yes! He's the owner! It's called Coopa Creations, he calls himself Coopa, the myspace page lists him as the owner, he was served at his own business!

She said nothing for a few seconds, then said if this information is true, that he owns that shop, then that changes everything.
It means he falsified his child support affidavit where he claims he only earns $11,000 per year.
He lied on official court documents.
I knew he lied on those papers when I read them.
He claims his present employer is Coopa Creations, yet he's the owner, not an employee, and he failed to fill out the rest of the paper work where he was supposed to list any and all assets, vehicles he owns, (he does own a nice car, his sister loaned lost him the money to buy it. he has never paid her back) supposed to list all the minor children he pays child support for, child care costs, medical expenses, bank accounts etc.
As a business owner with employees, he has to have at least one bank account for the business, to pay business related costs, and to pay his employees from.

She then asked me if I could prove he's the owner.
I said yes, he has a website where it lists him as owner, his own sister says he owns it, my friends have taken pictures of the store front where his name is listed as owner painted on the freaking glass.
She then said, "This changes everything. Thank you for this information, we will have to get a subpoena for financial records, but if he really is the owner, hasn't filed taxes for himself personally or the business, this case is now bigger than just modifying the child support."

I said well yeah, go after him all you want, but to raise my child support from $21 to $67 after 14 years, is a total slap in the face, and sorry, but his sons deserve more than that.
As a business owner, he can definitely afford to pay more than $67 per week, and I don't really give a crap about the other 4 kids. The two sons I had with him through marriage, have never received the full amount of support ordered in the last 14 years, and have only gotten birthday cards twice in all these years. He can pay up, it's long past due.

She said not to worry, they will definitely be looking into this new information, and she will be in touch with me about the hearing and any other information they need from me, or need to give me.
We ended the call, and I almost blew a gasket.
I cannot believe they didn't put 2 and 2 together, Cooper, Coopa Creations, they freaking served him at his business, and didn't realize he was the owner.
This whole thing is just so infuriating.
All these years of not getting the court ordered pitiful $21, and he was trying to pull a fast one again and claim he was just an employee making minimum wage.
Arggghhh!
But now they know, and hopefully they will fix this correctly.
$67 is not acceptable, imputing minimum wage on a business owner is not acceptable.
If I have to fly up there for the hearing, I'll sell everything that isn't nailed down to get there and face him in that courtroom.

Posted by Kat at 1:10 PM | Permalink | Comments (12)

It's currently 52 degrees out, the sky is a gorgeous shade of blue, and people are dressed in sweatshirts.

I got to massage therapy, and just as I thought, they all asked if I was cold, the therapist had warmed the table up, and I was all dude, turn the heat off man, this is gorgeous weather, enjoy it.
It's so hot here most of the year, that when days like this come along, let the chill do it's magic on you.
It makes you walk a bit faster, it puts a little color in your face, just take it and enjoy being outside in it.
I'm gonna find some lunch now and then get busy doing what I need to do.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 11:29 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I get such a kick out of the weather reporters here when they say a cold front is coming through.
Just look at this graphic for our 7-day forecast.

Hee hee, the 'cold' graphic is made to look like ice.
38 is cold?
Ha!
The people here really do think it's cold too.
I went for a walk this morning, and on my way back, a woman in a car stopped me to offer me a ride.
I was less than 3 houses away from my own, and it was very nice of her, but I was not cold, it was a beautiful day in my opinion.
I was wearing shorts and a t-shirt, and flip flops.
She was in her car wearing jeans, a shirt, and a jersey pull over.
She asked me if I was cold, did I need a ride, she just felt bad that I was walking in "such harsh weather".
I started laughing, didn't mean to, but seriously, it was about 52 degrees, and not cold.

Tomorrow, it's supposed to be about 38 degrees, I'll be wearing shorts and t-shirt, and my flip flops, and I'm sure everyone at the doctors office will ask me if I'm cold.
"Aren't you cold? It's so cold out there. I can't believe you're wearing shorts! Aren't your feet cold? I'm cold just looking at you!"
It's amusing to me how people react when someone isn't dressed how they think you should be dressed for the weather.
I'm actually looking forward to a chilly day.
It got hot here again, so a couple days of chilly will be nice.

Posted by Kat at 11:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

Sebastian has been learning how to use photoshop CS3 at school, and we have it at home now too, so he made this picture to share.
He tried sending it to ninny and pop pop, but it wouldn't attach to the email.
So anyway, here's his awesome picture.
He's way better at this stuff than I am.
He showed me how he made it, and I was all, um, uh, I can't do that.
I suck at this stuff, but he rocks.

Posted by Kat at 8:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Source.

Jessica Lunsford, the cute little 9 year old girl pictured here, was kidnapped, raped and murdered 3 years ago, by John Couey who lived just across from her home. Couey admitted that he kept her alive for 4 days before finally killing her, and that is part of the reason that Mark Lunsford is suing the Citrus County Sheriff's office.

The proposed lawsuit, which has not yet been filed, claims that if law enforcement officers had searched the mobile home of John Couey, the registered sex offender convicted of Jessica's rape and murder, instead of just searching the home's yard the night the 9 year-old girl disappeared, she would have been discovered.

Evidence revealed during Couey's trial showed that Jessica was kept alive for as many as four days before being buried alive. Couey was sentenced to death in August for the crimes.

During the search for Jessica, the mobile home's property and yard were searched several times, there are reports that neighbors told the officers to search inside the home, that something was going on in there, but the officers never searched inside the home.
The intent to sue also states that if the neighbors had been told about Couey's status as a sex offender when he moved in just 2 weeks before her disappearance, she might have been saved.

Lunsford says the sheriff's office wasted valuable time investigating his own father, questioning him about Jessica, instead of searching the home of the sex offender who lived just 100 yards from their front door.

But there are many critics of Lunsford, many calling him a liar and shady, and only suing for his own financial gain.
Lunsford has been given a brand new H2, (Hummer) "living high on the hog", he has a checkered past some are saying, others want to know where all the money raised from the charity rides has gone. They want an audit of all the monies raised and given to Lunsford.
Local radio personality, Bubba the love sponge, has been doing his own investigation into Lunsford.
It has been said that Bubba is about to expose Lunsford, and has had private investigators digging deep into his past and financial records.

Many people are questioning Lunsford's activities.
On the night Jessica was abducted, Lunsford was out partying at a bar with his 18 year old girlfriend. He and Jessica lived with his parents, and they left the door unlocked for him for whenever he came home.
The sheriffs confiscated Lunsford's computer and found some disturbing images on it, yet because his daughter was missing, they halted any investigation into those photographs.

This topic is high on many local Florida forums, a lot of people have some very strong opinions of Mark Lunsford, some calling him a meth head, a junkie, and having some dealings which are shady and possibly illegal.

I don't know where I stand on this.
I am now questioning his finances myself. He went from living with his parents, into a brand new home, driving an H2 that was given to him, and there have been many charity rides to raise money for the Lunsford foundation, but where is the money?
There is no accounting of those monies raised, and what about those pictures on his computer?
What were they of, and why did the police not investigate any further?
This will be an interesting story to follow, and if the suit does go forward, I am hoping that an audit of all the charity monies raised is done before letting this go any further.
I think people deserve to know what happened to that money, and if this suit is really about changing the policy on sex offenders, or if it's just for Lunsford's own gains.

Posted by Kat at 3:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

The other day my sis came over with the girls, and brought us dinner because I wasn't feeling very well at all and just couldn't cook anything. I was on the couch just being absolutely miserable.
My niece Skye came in and walked up to me and handed me this picture she colored.
She said "this for you aunty kat, you feel bad? you sick? i love you."

She then told me it was 3 telephones and a star, and to call when I feel better.
That's just too damn cute man. I love these girls.
Just look at how beautiful they are, my girls are so stinking pretty, and so smart.
From left to right, Susan, my sister Joey, and Skye.

And look at how gorgeous Skye is. I can't get over how absolutely beautiful she is.

Every time I see them, they just get bigger and more beautiful, and so smart.
They have learned so many new things between now and the last time I saw them, and they are funny.
Man, Susan is just a whip. She cracks jokes, she's sarcastic, she's just awesome.
It's gonna get her in trouble in school someday, being that snarky, but right now it's freaking adorable how witty and sarcastic she is.

Posted by Kat at 11:02 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I always wonder how much information is too much information, to put on my blog, and then I think to myself, if my experiences can somehow help someone else who may do a Google search for the same stuff, then it's just enough information and may help someone else.

Ok, so let's recap the last few drugs and therapies I've now tried.
First, we've been cutting back on Lortab 10/500 mg, from 12 per day, down to 4 per day.
This is a HUGE improvement, getting down to just 4 per day is awesome.
We're attempting to find a non-narcotic pain relief alternative, and that's why we're testing all these different drugs.
For the last 2 and a half weeks, we have not been using the Lortabs, and trying just the non-narcotic alternatives.
I've been doing my regular physical therapy, working the lower back and hip areas.
It feels extremely sore for a full day after therapy, then goes back to it's regular achy pain.
I am officially done with regular PT now.
I am still fighting this cold/virus/whatever it is thing the teens gave me too.
At least the fever broke this afternoon. I laid on the couch and covered myself in Sebastian's huge comforter, and just sweat it out.
Well I hope it's broke and gone now.
There's much more below the cut. (opens in same page, not a new window)

The first alternative was Ultram ER 300.
This is a once per day pain reliever.
I felt jacked up, dirty, sweaty, bug eyed, blurred vision.
He also prescribed Flexeril for a muscle relaxer.
The first few days, I was passing out cold within 20 minutes of taking them (the flexeril).
So we stopped taking those as well.

Then we tried Tramadol 50mgs.
Same feelings as above.
Then we cut those in half, and I still felt just as bad, dirty, slimy, and cracked out.

Next up was Zanaflex 4mg.
Really bad reaction.
Racing heart beat, dizzy, sweats, itchy, confusion, blurred vision, slurred speech, nausea, vomiting, muscle spasms in my legs, and just like the other two drugs, strung out.

Yesterday he prescribed 250 mg Soma.
It's a powerful muscle relaxer with a mild pain reliever attached.
I am supposed to take 3 per day.
He gave me a few sample packs and the script to get 90 of them.
I came straight home yesterday, I just didn't feel like going and sitting to wait for it at Walgreen's.
So I came home and opened up one of the samples, and within 30 minutes of taking it, I was out cold.
Upon waking, I was confused and shaky, as well as irritated.
Every time I wake up after taking one, I don't recall right away what day it is, or what time it is.
My sister called this morning and I had just dozed off, it took me about 5 minutes into the phone call, to remember what day it was, and I had to ask what time it was.
I was in a panic not knowing what time it was, because the boys were not here.
It can be very scary not knowing those things.
They call it a soma coma for a reason, and that is one of the things I have to get through to my doctor.
I cannot be strung out or sedated, confusion is so not ok.
I am a mother, I have to be clear of thought.

I have my next follow up appointment with him next Tuesday, March 4th.
I have to get through to him about being sedated, strung out, and the confusion.
I have now tried 4 different alternatives to the narcotics, and am not liking any of them because of the side effects.
You would think that the opiate pain relievers would be the ones to cause nasty side effects, but they don't.
I can actually function on narcotics, and I can't function on the non-narcotics.
My brain is all fuzzy on the 4 drugs I've tried now.
I wish that one of these had worked like the Lortabs, but they just don't.
One of the other side effects of the Soma is dry mouth.
I have drank about 2 gallons of water today, been sucking on ice cubes, and my mouth still feels like I was out licking sand.

This afternoon, my sis took me to Walgreen's to get the script filled, and come back home.
She also gave me a card from her boss, Cary, and inside it was a very much appreciated and very much needed gift.
Cary is just so sweet and kind. She's made sure the boys have had a decent Christmas the last few years, and her and her husband gave the boys some wicked nice clothes a few months ago, stylish in-fashion clothing, and gift cards for new games and such.
But her gift today has made it so I can now afford to get back and forth to every single one of those 7 appointments I have coming up.
That's such a huge relief, because I have to go to all these appointments. (Thank you so so much Cary)
Failure to go makes it look like I'm not cooperating with the doctors orders.
I am cooperating fully with every single thing he asks me to do.
I have 4 more massage appointments, 2 doctor follow up appointments, and 1 appointment to try Biofeedback therapy.
I will try anything he wants to try, but I am at my wits end on the medication testing.
I just can't feel strung out, dirty, confused, agitated, and miserable.
It is causing me to be severely depressed, and I do not like being depressed.
Those commercials about how depression affects more than just the person suffering from it, are true.
If mom is not ok, the teens are not ok.
I try very hard to not show how I'm feeling, but it's very difficult to do sometimes when every single noise sets me on edge, and I feel like at any moment I'm going to bawl my eyes out, then I get mad because I don't want to cry, and end up yelling for no reason.
I'm not yelling at the teens, I'm just yelling out of frustration and not feeling right, not feeling like myself.
I hate being like that, yelling, being upset, sleeping off and on when I should be taking care of my family.
I really am at the point of telling my doc to forget taking me off the narcotics, and I will just deal with them for the rest of my life.
They do not mess up my head the way these others have done.
And the sleeping issues are not ok either.
I take one single pill, pass out for anywhere from 20 to 50 minutes, and then when it comes time for bed at night, I can't sleep the whole way through.
I sleep in spurts of 20 minutes to an hour, then just toss and turn the rest of the night.
I'd rather be on the Lortabs, function during the day, have clear thought, get all my work and house stuff done, be able to enjoy being with my family, and have insomnia at night.
I never thought I'd say I'd rather have insomnia, but right now, I really would rather it be that way.

I know this was a wicked long post, but I needed to say all these things before I take my night time dose and get all foggy headed and pass out again.
Ok, I'm off to try and catch up with some of you before I take that dose.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 8:29 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Link to local story

Obviously not at my house, but this is a widespread issue.
It's a major story on CNN, something is up with the power grids.

About 4.4 million customers across South Florida were affected, Florida Power and Light officials said.
The outage struck shortly after 1 p.m., as scattered thunderstorms passed through the region. But the cause of the outage was not immediately known.
In Washington, officials at the Department of Homeland Security said there was no immediate concern that terrorism was behind the outage.

Posted by Kat at 2:28 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I'm sick with whatever the boys had and not doing so well at all.
And I'm tired and cranky, so yeah, another whiny post.
Sorry.
Between now and March 7th, I have 7 appointments.
That's 7 trips back and forth to the doctors that I just can't afford.
I'm over it.
I'm tired of trying new meds that make me spaced out and irritated, stupid fucking back massages that don't do shit for me other than cause me more pain, and injections that don't work, and now I'll be doing some new therapy.
I'm fucking over it.
Over it all.
I can't afford any of this shit.
I can't.
The stress of even trying to pay for all of this has probably attributed to me being miserable as well.
I'm just over this shit.
I am so tired of these meds that make me shaky, make me feel like I'm strung out.
Yes, he gave me another new one today, and one new pill and I'm a freaking mess again.
I can't take this.
I just can't.
I feel very bad, very very bad inside.
I'm getting depressed on top of feeling strung out, I really can't do this anymore.
I'm about to crack.

Posted by Kat at 1:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

The baby squirrel that is.
It came back today, and made his little high pitched squeal again, to let me know he was there.
I opened the door and it took me a second to find him, but there he was, on top of the screen door.

Don't wild animals usually stay away from people and homes unless they are sick or rabid or something?
I'm kind of concerned about this little guy, but don't really know what to do.
I took a little video of him, but I haven't edited it or uploaded it yet.
He was wanting to come in the house, he was not afraid of me.
Very odd.

In other news, I can thank the teens for making me sick.
I have been so tired today, coughing, sneezing, and I have an earache.
This is not good.
I have an appointment with pain doc on Monday morning at 11:15am.
I have to be at that appointment.
We have so much to talk about, but I'll probably end up canceling anyway.
I'm not gonna start thinking about it right now though. It's just more stress, and bah, I don't need that right this minute.
But between my medical appointments and all the over the counter crap I had to buy for the teens while they were sick, I'm in a tight spot.
Not gonna think about it.
Not gonna think about it.
*poof*
You know the saying the more you try not to think about a pink elephant, the more you'll think about a pink elephant?
Apply that, and well, there's a giant pink elephant in my house.

I think I'll go edit my baby squirrel video. I may not post it though.
I think Sebastian, or both the teens, said something not so nice in it, and I don't want PETA or any other animal lovers jumping on my shit over it.
But then again, it was said in a joking manner and nothing at all happened to the baby squirrel.
I closed the door after I saw his momma coming back for him again.
He's fine.

Posted by Kat at 11:23 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

That's the basic title of the article on the cover of this months Cosmopolitan.

Cosmo has that splashed across the cover of their March 2008 issue with Rhianna as the cover model.
I was like, new facts?
What new facts?
Is there something really new I need to know about my girly bits!?

So I rushed to page 234, where I was met with this headline;
Cosmo's Ultimate Guide to Your Va-Ja-Jay
Let's go over these fascinating "new facts" shall we?

1. It comes in a lot of varieties of shapes, sizes and colors, meaning the labia major and minor, or inner and outer lips to most people.
You don't say! Really? No two vagina are alike? Like precious little snowflakes. This isn't a new fact people.
Next!

2. It sweats. As you become sexually aroused, blood vessels in the vaginal walls enlarge and produce sweat and lubrication.
Again, this isn't a new fact to any woman who's ever had sex, thought about sex, or touched herself.
Next!

3. It's not a black hole where things can get lost.
Um, duh. It's anatomically impossible to lose anything in your vagina. It's only about 2 and a half inches long at rest, and there is nowhere for anything to go get lost in. Nothing can just slide up into your cervix.
Next!

4. It gets bigger to make room for any size penis that enters it.
Again, this is not a new fact. It's 2 and a half inches long, and 1 inch wide at rest, but can expand up to 6 inches in lentgh, and 2-3 inches in diameter when something like a penis goes in there.
Most women can take even bigger than 6 inches very comfortably, because the vagina expands and gets more lubricated as the female gets aroused.
I'm pretty sure most women already know this stuff, but Cosmo seems to think these are all new facts.
I think the article writer may be on crack.
Next!

5. And it really balloons to have a baby.
Well I'll be damned. Here's another d'oh moment for the article writer, who at this point I am guessing has either never had sex or is a man reading from a biology textbook.
Nope, it's a woman, Rachel Grumman.
I'm thinking she may have just entered puberty, or just discovered she has a vag.
Next!

6. There's some design flaws.
Yeah, no kidding. Ask any woman who has had a yeast or bladder infection or wiped her ass the wrong way.
Trust us, we know that fecal matter can accidentally make it's way up there.
The other flaw they pointed out was the position of the clitoris.
They wondered why it's outside instead of inside, then it hits them like a brick to the head.
Duh! If the clit were inside where a man's penis could easily stimulate it, then while giving birth, the woman would be in even more painful, over stimulated hell.
That's not a design flaw, that's a blessing in disguise.
And if your man doesn't know how to stimulate your clitoris, teach him ladies.
Don't have bad sex because your man is an idiot.
Please let number 7 be somewhat intelligent.
Next!

7. It needs to be checked out.
Yes! Finally an intelligent statement.
Just as you check your breasts each month, you should check yourself down there too, for changes in color or lesions, if you feel pain, get thee cooter to the gyno pronto!!
Next!

8. Every chick has a different scent.
Again, this is a no brainer, not a new fact. Just as no 2 vaginas look alike, no 2 smell the same either.
All vagina emit an odor, healthy ones, infected ones, aroused ones.
If your vag is healthy, it can be either sweet, earthy or musky, or even pungent.
The scent changes as you pass through your cycle every month, and you should take note of these changes, because if it ever smells different from your normal, get it looked at ladies.
Next!

9. Touching it can help you relax.
I am pretty freaking positive, every woman the whole world over knows this one.
Heck, even brand new babies will roll over onto a stuffed animal and rock back and forth with it between their legs because it's soothing and calming.
Endorphins are released which calms tension and stress, and can also help relieve pain.

Cosmo is a magazine aimed at women, and they've been in business a long, long time.
If they are going to start talking about new facts, then they should be new facts.
None of these 9 items are new facts at all.
Maybe to a teenage girl, they are new for the first time, but they are not new facts, and it kinda pisses me off that they would call them fascinating new facts when they are not new at all.
I mean, this is stuff we covered in my 8th grade health class for girls, and again in 9th grade parenting and health class.

As you read those, did any of you learn something new?
I guess if it helps one person learn something else about their vagina, it's a good article, but they really are not new facts, and have been known by doctors and women for a long, long, freaking time.

Posted by Kat at 8:54 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

The teens are home from school again today, been sick all week pretty much.
I hope they are well by Monday, it's been a very long week having them home a lot.
They are still really tired, they have been sleeping like 16 hours a day since coming down sick.

I've been up for hours, playing around on line, looking stuff up, having some interesting conversations with folks.
I still have things to do like file my taxes.
Yes, I was going to file this past week, but I had to switch things around because of sick kids and doc appointments.
I wish I could go do it today.
I have started a box for 2008 receipts though.
All those medical charges, medicine receipts, blogging stuff, etc.
I know I lost some stuff for 2007 tax filing, but I don't know where.
I went on a cleaning spree a few weeks ago, and I think I may have tossed a few big receipts out.
Damn it.
Oh well, I'll still get some decent deductions.

Ok, off to do some cleaning and other things around here that I need to do.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 12:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Yeah, I'm whining again, sorry.
I really think massage man messed up my left shoulder today.
About 3 hours ago, the upper part of my left shoulder and the under side of my shoulder blade, started hurting.
It feels like it's pinched in there a bit.

He really worked my shoulders today because of how much nerve damage I still have.
He said working them, getting the blood and muscles working through there, would help.
Maybe by tomorrow morning it will feel better, but right now, it freaking hurts.
Wah wah wah right?
Yeah, I know.

Off to watch LOST.

Posted by Kat at 9:00 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

The teens and I were watching the movie Alive, Sebastian had been wanting to see it, he heard about the rugby team from a friend, so I rented it from Netflix.
But anyway, we're sitting here watching it, and we hear this high pitched squealing kind of noise at the front door, so I get up to check it out.
I thought it may have been the kid next door with a whistle or something, but no, this is what I saw when I opened the door.

This itty bitty baby squirrel was trying to get in my house.

Then his momma came looking for him.

Oh the cats went CRAZY when they saw what was at the front screen.
Kali almost dove through it to get it, Shahiro was meowing and her eyes were HUGE.
She kept looking at me, then the squirrels, like hey, lady, let me out so I can get it!
Nova just stood back and observed with her eyes as wide open as she could make them go.

After a few minutes of struggling to get the baby in her mouth, the momma ran back up the palm tree with it in her mouth.

Posted by Kat at 6:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Massage therapists that is.
I mean, they're in a tiny room, dim lights, soothing music, and a half naked person laying on a table.
I have to wonder what the hell they think about for the full hour.
I know what I was thinking about, and that was, did I shave my legs good enough, did I shave my pits, how's my scar looking, stop fucking touching that spot dammit.
I was thinking, what does he think of the scar, does it gross people out?
Did he look at how far it goes down, all the way into my ass crack.
Did he see, on my left ass cheek, the scar from where they took bone for the graft?
Do they think people's bodies are gross?
I wonder how many old people he has to do this to.
How many of his patients are old people?
How many are young?
Am I the youngest patient he currently treats?
Does any part of this job turn him on, because if it does, I swear, I'm gonna be even more tense than I already am.

Yeah, I spent the entire hour thinking about that stuff, and making myself nervous.
I really do hate being touched, and I know I've mentioned that several times now, but it's the truth, I just can't stand being touched by people who I do not have some sort of personal relationship with.
Doctors are one thing, they are clinical, but massages?
That's bordering on the not okay zone for me.
And even though I hoped and wished I was done, I'm not.
I have it again Thursday the 28th, Monday the 3rd, and Thursday the 6th.
*squint*

I called the boys when I was done and waiting for my ride home, and asked if we needed anything else from the store aside from more Nyquil.
They said yeah, ice cream, pudding, pops, their throats are sore now too.
So on my way back, I stopped and picked up those items and some more light foods that they can eat.
I came back and gave them a half dose each of Nyquil, and they are both sleeping again now.
Sebastian is really bad, he threw up while I was gone, he wanted his mommy home right then and there, and not big brother Mark.

I feel like I need a nap, but I have a bunch of emails to respond to, and then fold last night's laundry, and then I can chill till dinner time.

Posted by Kat at 1:49 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I really can't explain what was happening in it, but it was somehow really important.
It was just a dream, but I just had this feeling I needed to finish it.
Oh well, maybe tonight.

Both the teens are sick.
Barking like dogs all night, even with Nyquil.
Poor things.
I have to wake them before I go to be tense for an hour, and give them some more Tylenol.
I don't like them taking it when I'm not here, I like to make sure they only take 2 caps.
They know to only take 2, but in their sick and confused state, I don't want them accidentally taking more.

I need to get in the shower.
I actually thought to myself, what if I don't take a shower?
Hrm.
Would the massage therapist be so grossed out, that he'd cut the hour long session short so I could bolt free from it early?
Or would he just say something like "wow, you must be in so much pain today, taking a shower would have made you feel worse?"
I imagine that's what he'd say to me, he's like that.
I really hope this is the last one, but I have a feeling it's not.
So I need to finish this up, get in the shower, and shave the bits that will be viewable I suppose.

The other reason I want this over, is financial.
Between these hour long massage therapy sessions, my regular PT which has another 2 appointments to go, and regular doctor visits approximately every 2 weeks, I am so strapped for cash I'm ready to cry.
I simply can't afford to keep paying for therapy appointments on top of, regular appointments.
Yes, I only pay a co-pay, but man, it's still not been easy with 3 full appointments every week, and the smallest co-pay I make being $10, and the largest co-pay being $30.
This week has cost me $70.
Ouchie.
And I bust my ass to make money to cover these appointments, and I am still cutting it close today.
Thank goodness this is the last appointment this week, I am officially broke once I get home.
Well not totally broke, I have food money budgeted and set aside, but that is food money, not doctor money.
They cannot ever cut into the food budget.

Alrighty, I have officially rambled longer than i should have, gotta go!
Later days!

Posted by Kat at 7:25 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I wanted to update you on the AC situation from last night.
I spent about 2 hours cleaning it out today.
I removed the vent panel cover, washed all the grates inside with a toothbrush, sucked out a bunch of stuff from inside the fan area, and washed the whole face plate down.
After turning it back on, the whirring noise was gone.
Yay!
But, it had started whistling.
Boo!
But after a few hours, that stopped too, and now it's back to being whisper quiet again.
Yay!
So thanks to Christine's husband Mike, for letting me know it was just the fan, and not dying.
He was so right!

Annd, I'm still watching Idol and I gotta tell ya, not impressed with any of these chicks tonight.
They all sound like they smoked 3 packs of cigs today.
Just one raspy voice after another, except for that Alexandrea chick.
I liked her.
I don't care if they were all sick this week, they really are just way too raspy.
And I bet you all would think I would love that rocker chick, Amanda Overmyer right?
Well I don't.
She is nasaly.
It's all coming out of her nose, and I hate it when people sing through their nose!
Oh my god! Open your mouth, use your diaphragm and open up those pipes ladies!

Posted by Kat at 9:21 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I made a huge pan of my cheesy chicken stuffs for dinner, and the boys who had slept all day from being down with the sickness, ate the entire pan.
And now they're laying back down again watching tv.

I am doing laundry so I can have clean clothes to wear to tomorrows torture fest.
That's massage therapy, for those of you just tuning in.
Hate it, hoping this is the last one.

Now I'm watching American Idol.
I'm not a big fan of the show, but I watch it when I'm bored.
What I don't like about it is the fact that there are professionals on it.
I like that Carly chicks voice, but she had her shot at fame, she had a record deal, and the label dropped her because she didn't sell enough.
That's it toots, buh-bye.
I want to see unknowns, kids with talent and undiscovered, in this thing, that's who I want to see win it, not someone who has already been there and failed.

Posted by Kat at 8:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

"I want to collaborate with Amy [Winehouse] because she's really hot and cool right now. I know one song Rehab, was very popular particularly because a lot of young people are in
alcohol rehab as well. In fact I'm thinking about going. It looks like loads of fun and I know my career will benefit from it."

She was quoted as saying the above during a recent intimate show in London.
Source.

The media is of course, blowing this comment out of proportion.
She was being sarcastic, humorous, funny.
I think it was quite funny myself.
Ha ha!
And before anyone thinks I'm making fun of people in rehab, no, I'm not, been there myself years ago.
I just love to see other celebs who have managed to rise above the obvious drug and alcohol parties, and other pitfalls of fame, slam it into the ones who do multiple stints in rehabs like it's the fun "in thing" to do, a way to boost attention to themselves and get even more famous.
Since when is being a drug addict cool ya know?

The media hype machines, love to get the stories of the stars going to rehabs, they post it every where on line, on the gossip tv shows, heck, I've even seen it mentioned on the nightly news.
Yes I'm glad they are getting help for their problems, but some of these young stars start to fall out of the press light, and it's like their managers come up with this great way to get them back in the lights and headlines.

"Hey! I got this great idea to get you more press coverage! Let's put you in rehab for a few weeks [insert name of falling star here]!"

"Oh hey! That totally worked for [insert name of recent rehab graduate star here]! Ok, let's do it! Get a photog to take my picture of me sitting in my car with a beer or staggering out of a nightclub! I can totally stagger if it means more money!"

Then they come out of rehab, and everyone says how proud they are that so and so is doing so much better, and a few weeks later, they are back to being a role model for today's youth.

Posted by Kat at 2:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Here are the 2 sickos, sound asleep on the couches.
They are both just down for the count from whatever they have.

Oh please oh please, do not let me catch what ever the hell this is.
And yes, that is a strip of duct tape across the floor.
The teens pc in the other room, is not wireless.
Yet.

Posted by Kat at 1:57 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Like a big bubble for me to live in.
Why?
Both the teens went to school, and both the teens came right back home.
Ok, not right away, Mark made it to about 8:30am, and Sebastian made it until about 10am.
They are both coughing, sneezing, feverish, and miserable.
Time to dose them up with Nyquil and Tylenol, and keep them the hell away from me.
Maybe stick them on some Branson lots out in the middle of nowhere so I don't catch it.
They can live in the bubble, I have stuff to do.
I swear, if I get sick again, I'm gonna be super pissed.
I can't stand getting sick all the time, and having to deal with new sickness aches and pains, along with my already have aches and pains.

Damn it.
I was really hoping this thing wasn't going to spread around amongst us.

Posted by Kat at 10:51 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So yeah, I'm still up because the AC whirring is making me kind of nutty, I'm like too tense to sleep, afraid it might blow up or something.
I know, totally unrealistic fear, but hey, that's me.

So I'm surfing the net and I come across the perfect watch for me.
I don't wear a watch everyday, I don't think the watches I own currently, fits well with my oh so casual style of dress.
But I came across this site for Technomarine watch styles, and found this one.
I love it!
I like the design of the numbers, the nautical look, the blue and the black together.
It's perfect.

I should try to get to bed soon though.
I'm a bit shaky, need to rest.
Mark will be attempting to make it to school tomorrow.
We'll have to see how he's doing in the AM I guess.

Posted by Kat at 12:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Ok, I barely got this video recorded because my camcorder batteries were once again dead, and the other set was in the GH3 guitar.
Again.
Sebastian has GOT to start placing them back in the charger man.
Ergh.

Anyway, I need a handyman's help here, someone who knows AC units would be especially helpful.
The AC unit, which is a standard window box unit, started making this whirring, sorta grinding noise at around 9pm.
It has been running fine all day long, so this is just weird.
I even cleaned the filter today, so I know it's not clogged with dust on the inside.
I went outside and looked at it with the flashlight, cuz of course, (!) this starts once it's nightime, (always the way my luck goes!) and I can see a hornets nest in the big grated box thingy that holds the AC unit in place, with several little buzzing bastards crawling around on it.
I'm thinking one of the little buggers got sucked into the vents/grates whatever they are called, and is being chopped to bits.
Except for the fact that it's still doing it.
Going on about 40 minutes now, off and on.
Whirring, stop, whirring, stop.
Is the AC unit dying?
Is it the fan?
Can you hear it in this video?
It is never, ever that loud even when standing right next to it.
Ever.

Posted by Kat at 9:33 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Next Saturday, I turn 38. I can hardly believe that I will be that age.
I'll be *gasp* 40 when Mark turns 18.
I certainly do not have the mentality of an older person, but man, my body is fast approaching like age 120.

But I think my brain my be catching up with my body.
I actually watch those late night advertisements for adjustable beds, and covet one.
I want my feet to rise, my head to rise, fold me in half like a peanut butter sandwich, little up, little down, head way up, feet just barely.
I would have so much fun in one of those beds!
I know I enjoyed the heck out of the one I spent 18 days in for my back surgery two years ago.
Or maybe it was the combination of the morphine drip and the moving bed that made me like it.
hrm......

And I totally let my two year surgiversary pass without mentioning that it was two years.
Not that I don't know it's been two years, but it just slipped my mind on the ninth and sixteenth, that those were my surgery days.
Maybe my brain is lapsing and I'm getting all forgetful, or maybe I'm just wanting to be so much more than my spine fusion has allowed me to be for two years now, that I purposely forgot those days.
hrm...

I don't know how I plan on spending the big three-eight this year.
It's on a Saturday, and I suppose I should do something, but what?
Movie?
Dinner?
Dancing?
Ha!
I'll think of something I'm sure, maybe a night out with my Tampa crew, hit up Peabodies or Ybor City for Castle or Czar.
Any ideas?

Posted by Kat at 7:35 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I was chatting through email yesterday with blog reader Chris, about market research and various other ways to make money on line.
She had no idea on some of the other ways to make money, and the question came up over my post about my child support.

Yes, I was complaining about the increase, which is very low in my opinion, and so she asked how I was making ends meet.
I work on line, I do various reviews, some market research like she does, I will be getting back to making jewelry again sometime soon, I hope, and there are companies that pay you to work from home.
When I first started working from home, I worked for about 15 different on line market research companies who all paid in different ways.
Some cash through paypal, some in gift certificates to on line retailers, and some accrued your earnings and allowed you to choose your payout once you reach a certain level.
I think I've done almost every form of on line money making.
I kinda have to.

Posted by Kat at 6:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

That's Mark, he even looks pathetically sick doesn't he?
He's just wiped out and super tired. His fever has gone down some, but he's sniffling, coughing, cranky.

And the cat there is Nova, or as I've taken to calling her today, the drooler.
She sleeps on my bed with me, up near my head, and last night she placed her whole head in my hand to go to sleep.
She was purring away, happy as can be, and then she fell asleep.
And that's when she started drooling.
In my hand.
I was all 'eww'', and pulled my hand out from under her head.
Then I did the only logical thing I could think of at 3am.
I wiped her drool back onto her fat sleeping body.

I never realized she drooled when she sleeps, but now it makes total sense why the other 2 cats will not sleep at the head of my bed.
They will come up there, but they start sniffing the sheets and pillows, and go right back down to the foot of my bed.
They smell her cat drool.
Her sleepy, stinky, unconscious, cat drool on my bed.

Posted by Kat at 5:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

If you guessed Mark, you'd be correct.
I gave him some Nyquil last night so he could sleep instead of couch all night long, and he woke up with a raging hot fever like he had last night.
I gave him some more Nyquil this morning, and am letting him sleep.
He's tired he tells me, so he can sleep all day if he feels the need to.

Sebastian wasn't too thrilled about having to go to school alone, but he's healthy, he can go to school.
I know it's still kinda scary for him being a freshman and walking by himself at such an early hour of the day, but he won't always have big brother Mark by his side in life, he can manage for just one day while Mark gets better.

I've been up most of the night, I just couldn't sleep.
Stress, lots of thinking about things and people, home, finances etc.
I drive myself crazy over thinking everything I tell ya.
I think a lot of my stress last night, had to do with the medication screw ups this past month, and the weekend feeling like crap, and then allowing people to get under my skin.
I need to not do that, I know.
But I vented, I thought, I over thought, and I calmed myself down.
I cannot control the actions of other people, I can only control my reactions to those actions.
But as a Pisces, I am a deeply emotional person, I take on the weight of the world, attempt to do everything and be everything, to every single person who I come in contact with.
It's a zodiac curse to be under this sign.

So I've resolved for today, (one day at a time if need be) to only take control of my reactions to others actions.
To not allow the petty and negative influence they are attempting to place on me, onto me.
Today will be a good day.
That is how I am starting it, and I will not end it on a bad note.
If a bad thing happens, I will react to it as best I can, and continue to strive for a better day.

So let's all try to have a good Tuesday, let's only take on what we place onto ourselves, and not allow others negative ideas and desires, into our happy place.
'Om'

Posted by Kat at 8:27 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

You ever have people in your life who are just negative?
They have to start trouble where there is none?
They take everything as a a personal offense to them, even if it's not?
I wish I could just shake these people from my life, but that's not possible.
It's simply not possible.

It's times like these, and people like these, that make me want to just quit doing what I'm supposed to do, but I would be letting others down if I did that.
I know I'm blunt, to the point, always been brutally honest, and other people can't handle that.
They want things sugar coated, they want to be coddled, they want to have the same kind of control they have in every other part of their lives, and they don't have it, so they are attempting to get me removed from what I was asked to do.

Honestly, it would be easier to just quit.
It would make my life so freaking much easier.
I wouldn't have to deal with this type of behavior any longer.
Maybe I could just take some time off and let them run amok, do what they want, get away with what ever it is they feel like they deserve to do all the time.
I don't know.
But I do know I'm over this crappy ass behavior and so are other people.
Man, I'd love to publish some of the emails I get from others who are so over the negative bullshit.
I need a vacation, but I have stuff I am supposed to do, and I will continue doing it until I'm asked by the people that put me in this place, to step down.
Blah.

Posted by Kat at 10:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

Mark is sick with something.
He's been coughing most of the day, been home from school for presidents day, so I've been listening to him bark all day long.

He came to me a few minutes ago and said "Mom, I think I'm wicked sick."
He held up his shaggy long hair, and I felt his forehead.
You could cook something on that head of his.
So I busted out the Tylenol, gave him two tabs, and will give him a shot of Nyquil so he can sleep tonight.
He will probably not be going to school tomorrow.

When Mark is sick, he's really sick.
Been like that since he was a baby, he got pneumonia when he was 9 months old, had to be rushed to the hospital and oh man, the tubes and wires they started placing on my little baby, I was terrified.
He very rarely gets sick, but when he does, that's it, he's down for the count.
If his fever gets too bad, I'll be taking him to the docs.
So far though, it's just a fever with a cough. He's not nauseous or achy, just a cough and hot to the touch.
I'll be making him take a shower in a little bit, to help bring the fever down a bit, or at least cool him off.

But whatever it is he has, I don't want it.
I spend enough of my own time fighting off illnesses and other crap.
There will be no mommy kiss goodnight tonight, that's for sure.
Of course, when he's sick, that's when he wants mommy hugs and kisses.
When he's healthy, he's a typical 16 year old boy who hates being loved on by his mommy. hahaha

Posted by Kat at 7:47 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I had a talk with my doc today after my massage therapy appointment, about the alternative drugs he has been trying on me.
See, I've been on narcotic pain relievers for over 6 years, and I've been wanting to get off of them, and we've been attempting to do that.
The problem is though, that the synthetic pain relievers mess with me and my head in very bad ways.

The first one we tried, Ultram ER 300, I felt like I was jacked up on some really dirty street drugs.
My skin crawled, my pupils were dilated, my vision was blurry, my hearing was affected, and my moods went all bi-polar.

Then we tried Tramadol 50 mgs.
Same exact reaction, because it's simply a lower dose of the Ultram, and the main drug in both is Tramadol.
Then we cut those 50's in half.
Same exact reaction.
Strung out like a crack head.

Then just this past Thursday, we tried Zanaflex 4mgs.
This is a medication given to people with MS for spasticity issues. The medicine is supposed to relax the muscles by stopping pain sensations to the central nervous system.
I only took one of those pills, and I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
My heart raced, I had the sweats, I was itchy, I couldn't think straight, my speech was slurred, and I couldn't sleep.
My stomach was in knots and I threw up several times, and my muscles spasmed.
The complete opposite of what the drug is supposed to do.
It also made me feel like the other two previous synthetics, strung out, high, messed up and dirty.

So today, I told my doc that if every synthetic on the market is like these 3, I'll stay on the narcotics because I cannot live like that.
Over 6 years on opiate pain relievers, and not once have I ever been that screwed up.
Ever.
I have a drug history, most of my readers know this.
Back in my teens, I did quite a bit of street drugs, I've never lied about my past drinking and drugging experiences.
Ok, I lied to my parents while I was doing them back then, but I don't and haven't done street drugs in years and years, like 13 years.
I took a couple hits off a joint about 2 years ago, the night I went to a concert before my surgery, my one last night of being blitzed I guess you could say.
I knew I was going in for surgery in February, so in December at the Genitorturers show, I had a couple shots, a few puffs, and enjoyed the show and the night with two of my best friends.

But even all those years ago doing pot and LSD, and drinking daily, I never once felt as strung out as I have been feeling trying these synthetic opiates.
Heck, even doing cocaine all those years ago, never made me feel this bad.
I honestly don't know how other patients can take them, or maybe my brain and body just metabolizes them in a different way.

I have another appointment with him on the 25th, and he said we can really sit down and talk about this then.
We couldn't have a regular appointment today because of medicare rules.
If I have therapy, I can't have a doc appointment on the same day. Kind of a silly rule, but that's how medicare rolls.
I will do what he says to do, but if I have to keep feeling strung out like that, then no, I'll stay on the narcotics for the rest of my life if need be.
Is this all too much info for you?
Sorry, but I'm brutally honest about shit like this, I see no point in lying about what's going on with me.

The massage therapist asked me how I was doing, and I just broke down and told him I couldn't take it anymore.
I can't handle being that messed up like that.
I don't like how the synthetics make my moods go all over the place.
One minute I'm fine and the next, I'm ready to rip the teens apart for breathing.
I got pissed at one of my cats this weekend.
For sitting on my lap.
That's insane.
I was behaving like a crazy person, and I'm not crazy.
I was so scared on Friday because the Zanaflex hadn't worn off, and my heart was still racing, I almost called for an ambulance.
I thought I was going to have a heart attack, it was beating so fast and so hard, I wasn't sure I was going to make it.
How the hell can other people take those drugs?
I can't even imagine having MS and having to take those drugs all the time for muscle spasms, and being so fucked up in the head.

And the massage therapy, god damn I hate it.
I have real issues with being touched.
I can't stand people touching me at all.
I don't like being hugged, have someone take my hand or arm, I wish I could explain it, but I tense up and get nervous.
So an hour long massage is fucking hell for me.
I have to keep telling the guy over and over, about my back and the still not regrown nerves, because the slightest touch sends me into fits.
He pressed one spot today and it sent muscle spasms all the way up my spine.
He was all "Whoah, you're really tense and tightened up today huh?"
I'm all dude, how many times must I tell you that my back is hypersensitive, and to take it easy, because the next time you press down on my shoulder blade, I'm gonna get up and punch you in the freaking head.

I know I have pain in my hip and lower back area, and the therapy is supposed to help with that.
The deep pressure stuff feels great on those areas, but anything shoulder blades to mid back, is like knives being jammed into me.
I have another appointment with him on Thursday.
Yee fucking haw.
Between my people touching me issues, and the nerve sensory issues, I am not enjoying massage therapy at all.
I hate every freaking minute of that hour.
I hate the music he plays, the touching, the questions about my pain levels when he touches here or there.
I'm in freaking hell but I do it because I have to.
I want to get better, I want things to be ok, I want to be done with narcotics and therapy, but the way things are going, it will be awhile.
Doc ended up writing me a script for a different dose of narcotics before I left, to get me through till the 25th with him, when we can sit down and really discuss what's going on.
I really do want to get off the narcotics, but not if it means losing my sanity and feeling street drug dirty.
I don't know if any of you can even understand that feeling, maybe someone who's reading this knows what I mean, but it's like crack or meth, or some really dirty drug. My skin gets slimy, I sweat, I feel like I'm covered in dust and dirt, I itch, my legs get restless, I feel nauseous and gross, strung the fuck out.

This was all probably way too much to tell you, but I just had to say what's been going on with me, so if you're one of the people I snapped at in the last month, you know why.
I apologize for talking to you like that, but it wasn't me.
I know, sounds like a lame excuse, but it really wasn't me.
Mark, my oldest, said to me on Friday morning, a full 24 hours after taking that one pill, "Mom, you're really bad right now. Your eyes are huge, you're breathing heavy, you're shaking. Do I need to call for help mom? This is scary."
I can't be scary like that around my kids. I can't be all over the place and yelling, screaming, sleeping, upset, crying, scratching myself to pieces.
I scared my kids man.
It's not ok to be like that.
It's not ok to be scary around my sons like that, so if every alternative to opiate pain relievers is like those 3, then forget it, I'll just stay on the Lortabs for life.
Fuck it.

Posted by Kat at 11:49 AM | Permalink | Comments (6)

For my massage therapy this morning.
I really do hate it.
I wish I didn't, but I do.
I just hate having people touch me.
Loved ones, family, is ok, but I'm tired of doctors and therapists and stuff.
I'm wicked uncomfortable having massages.
Stupid right?
But I'm going because I have to, gotta do what they say right?
I need to get in the shower and get ready.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 7:04 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

The boys have a 4 day weekend.
It sucks.
It's been non-stop video games since Thursday night.
Frankly, I'm tired of the blip blip, the beep beep, and the other various sound effects.

Why do they have a 4 day weekend?
Well Friday was a teachers professional day, and Monday is Presidents day.
What I don't get is why school is closed for presidents day, but every other place is open.
I have a doctors appointment for massage therapy on Monday, and if the docs can go to work, why can't the schools be open?

There are no parades that I know of, stores are open, etc, so why do the kids need the day off?
Shouldn't they be in school learning about the presidents, for example?
So because I'm cranky and tired, I've declared today a no video game day.
They have to find other ways to amuse themselves.
I just can't handle or deal with any more sound effects today.

Posted by Kat at 10:50 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

So yeah, back in April 2007, I put in for a modification of my child support.
He had been ordered to pay a whole whopping $21 per week for the last 14 years.
He could barely do that, but he's a business owner now, so I figured hey, he's finally making something of his life, he can afford to start paying for more of the teens care.

In today's mail, I got a packet of papers detailing the new modified support.
Are you ready for this?
Hang on to your panties kids, this is gonna blow your minds.

The new modified support is $67 per week, supposed to be deducted from his paycheck automatically, but uh, he's the boss, he writes the paychecks.
I won't ever see that $67 per week.

At the bottom of the court papers he signed, he claimed hardship.
Said he already pays $400 per month in child support.
Hey pal, not my problem that you fathered six children, maybe if he kept his dick in his pants, he wouldn't have to pay so much for all these kids huh?

For the last 14 years, he's been court ordered to pay $21 per week, per kid. I've never seen that amount on a regular basis. For years, he didn't pay anything at all.
Heck, this Friday he paid in, $20.20.
Amazing huh?!
I seriously can't believe that the courts felt that $67 a week is substantial for the care of his two sons who have gone years and years without any child support, only got it when he felt like being honest and paying it.
Sure it will be $268 a month, but he's never ever been able to pay the $21 per week, he won't be able to do this.

To say I'm disappointed in the state of Maine court system once again, is an understatement.
He's claiming hardship and they fell for it.
He owns his own business, he can cook his books, write his own paychecks, and no one will be the wiser.
Gah.

Posted by Kat at 5:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

I've had a most icky day, I don't want to whine about it, but let's just say I probably could have used one of these posture correction things last night and today.
My back and whole body has just been a mess, but I think that one pill is finally wearing off.
Zanaflex + Kat = way bad interaction.

But anyway, I got up this morning after barely getting 2 hours of sleep due to that rotten pill, and found my phone to be sending the whole dead air deal.
My net was on and off all day, just a big mess.
I called Verizon.
Gah, that right there should tell you how fun of a day I had with them.
They tell me there's noise on my line, but most likely coming from my equipment.
I no longer have an answering machine cuz that got fried 3 weeks ago when the transformer blew, so the only things connected to the line were my phone and DSL line.

I went outback and tested the NID box, (Network Interface Device) got the same dead air back there.
Verizon calls me back and insists it's my phone.
I tell them I tested my phone at my neighbors house and it worked just fine.
They insist it's still my phone, but they'll send a tech out to take a look.

The repair guy gets here and sets about testing the lines.
He can hear the noise on the line, and goes about trying to find the faulty wire.
He comes back nearly an hour later, and tells me it's definitely not my phone.
There's a line on the next pole over from the one that had the transformer blow, and it was almost blown apart.
All the wires inside the line were exposed to the elements.
He wrapped a temporary line cover on it so my phone and net would work again, and tells me that a repair crew will have to come out and replace that whole line.

We plug my phone back in, and yup, I now have a signal again instead of air.
I'm so so glad it was not my phone, I feel vindicated.
Why?
Because if it had been my phone or the wires inside my home, they would have charged me $80 bucks per hour to repair it.
But seeing as it IS there line outside, I don't have to pay a dime.
But once again, Verizon DSL has not charged my CC for the bill that was supposed to be paid on the 28th.
I had to call them again today and ask them to charge my card.
I swear, they just keep screwing up my billing month after month after month.

He leaves and I go back to my couch, just to chill and try to relax.
My legs were still doing the herky jerky spasm crap from that one rotten pill I took.
It's supposed to be an anti-spasmodic, they give that muscle relaxer to MS patients, but it can have very bad side effects.
I only took one Zanaflex, it should have worn off within 3-6 hours, but I was at the over 24 hour mark, still having bad side effects.
I was nauseous, vomiting, my heart was racing, and instead of calming my muscles down, it made them do a little freak out.
My legs and lower back muscles twitched all night last night and all day today, with a pounding racing heart.
My mouth was dry, I had the runs wicked bad, and I wasn't eating or drinking anything at all.
I was tired and dizzy, but couldn't sleep.
At one point, I got so scared that my heart was beating so fast, that I thought about going to the ER.
My chest hurt, I was actually scared I was having some sort of adverse reaction that was going to cause me to have a heart attack.
I just tried to lay down and rest as much as possible all day and night.
I think it's finally worn off, and thank goodness for that. I was really scared for awhile there.

I sent to the boys to the store to buy subs for dinner, and we chilled out and watched a movie tonight.
Gone Baby Gone is an awesome movie.
I don't want to spoil it for anyone, but you need to see it if you haven't already.
Great cast too. I really liked it, and it had one of those endings that you just don't know which side you should have been on.

Posted by Kat at 11:14 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

That pill really messed me up bad.
I haven't slept, I'm so exhausted man.
I'll be back around later on.

Posted by Kat at 12:18 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

On days like today, it would be awesome to have a small business phone system and answering service or machine.
Something that would say;
"Thanks for calling Kat, she'd love to come to the phone right now, but she's knee deep in the thick of it all. Please leave a message after the beep, and she'll call you back as soon as possible."

I just want to lay down and sleep now.
The doc called me back. Yes, I caved and called him, because this just isn't right, and he said stop taking them, don't take any more, we'll try something else when I see you next.
Um, dude, I don't see you again till like 2 weeks from now, but I have massage therapy on Monday, can't we just take care of this then?
Probably not.
I'm going back to my couch now.
Hot, cold, sweats, itch, gah!

Posted by Kat at 5:48 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

So yeah, went to the docs to have him get me off the lower dose, cut in half, Tramadols.
He put me on Zanaflex.
My my, let me just tell you the fun with taking just one of these fucking things.
I'm out of it.
I'm dizzy, going from hot to cold, itchy, lightheaded, nauseous.
Not having a good time here folks, at all.

He did give me that injection that I talked about, but it takes anywhere from 6-8 hours to feel it, if it's going to have any effect.
I got it around 10:20 this morning, not feeling anything at all yet.

I really hate to whine and complain, but dammit, I don't feel good. These things are making me feel like shit.
I don't wanna call him, I only have taken one, but what if I wait and try to see if these side effects go away?
What if they don't?
What if I feel like this all weekend?
Blah.
I hate all this medical stuff ya know. I just want it over with once and for all.
I'm tired of the doctors, the drugs, the icky side effects, all of it.

Posted by Kat at 4:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

For my sanity.
Another medication is messing with me, can't stand it.
Be back later.

Posted by Kat at 9:22 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I wish I had one of those popup tv lifts in my room, with a nice flat panel digital or LCD tv in it, for days like today.
With a dvd player.

It has been off and on rain with high humidity, for the last 2 days now, and will be like this again tomorrow they say.
This sucks.
These damn titanium rods are ice freaking cold.
I tried working out on the elliptical this morning, but because of the massive pain in my hips and lower back, I only managed just 10 minutes before I had to get off of it and lay down.
Agony on days like this.

I either laid on the couch or in my bed, most of the day.
I did manage to go to the store, pick up Tylenol and toilet paper, cat food, cat litter, all that stuff that we needed, then I came home and laid down again.
Dinner is being cooked, and then it's couch and blanket time for me again.
I just can't get these rods warm to save my life.

Posted by Kat at 5:59 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

It's still really bad weather, scattered t-storms throughout the day, over cast, drizzly.
Me and my couch are best friends again.
Later days.

Posted by Kat at 10:40 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

This is the current sky as seen from my driveway.
We, and many other counties, are under a tornado watch, until whenever.
There is no end time, just a watch, just wait.

No one from the school called me back about the field trip, so I called and spoke directly to the teacher.
Her reason for not filling out the form?
She was in a hurry.
But yes, they are going to GWiz, and yes, it's $56.00, but it's optional, students do not have to go.
What will they do if they don't go?
Regular classes will be happening because the teacher who arranged the trip, the teacher I spoke with, isn't going on the field trip she planned.
Nice huh?
She's obviously a very busy teacher, she doesn't have time to fill out the field trip form or even go on the field trip she planned.
Baffling.

I'm taking the ultra lazy route on dinner this evening.
BBQ chicken breasts and french fries.
Two baking sheets in the oven, one with fries, one with boneless, skinless, breasts.
In about 20 minutes, I'll go throw some sauce on the chicken, and voila, dinner will be served.
I'm just wicked tightened up in my shoulders and lower back from the weather.
We may even get hail, said the weather guy.
Won't that be fun?
I haven't seen hail here since one of the hurricanes about 4 years ago.

I'm still learning how to do all the different functions of my camera, and took a bunch of shots today after my batteries charged back up.
Maybe I'll post some of my face ones from the batch.
Later days!

Posted by Kat at 5:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I put a call into the high school about the field trip, and am waiting on someone to call me back.

What I want to know is, if some students don't go, what will they do at school that day?
Will they be sitting in an all day study hall?
It's pretty much an all day field trip even though it's only right here in town, they will be missing most of their classes.
So, if a student doesn't go on the trip, where and what will they be doing?

I spoke to the principals secretary, who didn't even know about the field trip, was surprised that the principals signature is on the form, (it wasn't the teachers sig, it is the principals) and knew absolutely nothing about the cost, the chartered bus, nada.

You would think someone is the principals office would know about the trip and clear it, but if the secretary doesn't know, then how did this trip get approved?
I'll let you know what happens and what students will be doing if they don't go.
If it's an all day study hall, free periods, what's the point of students going?

Posted by Kat at 12:36 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I suppose you could call this a cat post, but it's just 3 pictures of my pretty kitty Kali.
She is 10 years old now, and the most loving, beautiful cat I have ever owned.
She just lays there, purring away, while I snap a few pictures.
I would have kept taking some more, but my batteries were dead, and I found my other pair of rechargeables in the GH3 guitar.
Click for bigger.

I love her colors.
She has the most gorgeous coloring, and it's so soft, like a nice blanket soft.
Her fur is thick, and she's always grooming herself.
I love that her nose is just as colorful as her fur, it's cute, makes her so unique.

She is getting older now, has to eat special food, and you can tell her age is catching up to her.
At night, it's almost like she has muscle spasms.
She shudders while she sleeps between my feet, it shakes the whole bed.
I'll be taking her to the vet when I get my income tax back, just to have her checked out.
I hate to think that something may be wrong with her heart or something.
She's my baby, my cat, my best fur friend.
When I was in the hospital, she was so sad and worried, she licked all the fur off of her belly, it was pure flesh by the time I came home.
And when I did come home, she didn't leave my side for weeks.
I was in bed for hours and hours every day, and she would stay with me, right by my side.
She'd run out to the kitchen and swallow down food in a flash, a quick drink of water, and then rush back to my side, where she would spend the next hour just licking my hands, my arm, my face.

I hate to think of the day she will no longer be with me.
That thought consumes me sometimes, and I am flooded with emotions.
I know it's coming, I hope not soon, but I have to prepare myself for that day whenever it comes.
It kills me to think of going to bed and not having her between my feet, her back up against one of my legs, one paw outstretched, touching my other leg, doing that loving kneading touch she does when she's happy.
If I lay on the couch, she can barely wait till my body is settled and comfortable, before she jumps up on top of me, licks my face, and then settles into a sleeping position on top of my chest and stomach.

She's my pretty baby, my girl, my Kali kitty.

Posted by Kat at 8:50 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

Sebastian came home with a BLANK field trip form.
This one.
Click for bigger.

All it has on it is the teachers signature and today's date.
She told the students to fill it out themselves, and to tell parents the cost of this field trip is $56.00.
Well, for that kind of money, where are they going?!
Must be someplace really cool and costly right?!
No!

Well it is cool, but not expensive.
They are going to GWiz, right here in Sarasota, to see the Bodies Revealed exhibit, which costs $17.00 for kids ages 3-18.
That includes access to the ENTIRE museum as well.

Now why does this field trip cost so much if the actual exhibit is only $17.00 per student?
Because they are taking a chartered bus, making every student buy a t-shirt, and stopping for lunch at McDonald's.

Why doesn't this class, just take one of the local school buses?
Why do they have to rent a chartered bus, to go from Proctor road to Boulevard of the Arts?
It's EXACTLY, 5.81 miles, and the total driving time is 13 minutes.
Tell me why they need to charter a bus for this?!

This is ridiculous!
Taking a chartered bus to go a whole 5.81 miles?!
Are they high!?
I refuse to spend that kind of money when they could just take a regular school bus, pay the regular admission price, and let the students decide if they want the freaking t-shirt.

Posted by Kat at 3:20 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I used a random, random number generator I found online, entered the numbers 1 through 7, for the 7 people who commented on the contest entry.
Each comment was given a number in order of how their comment was posted.

Using this random generator, the winner was comment number 2, Sara!
Click for bigger.

Congrats Sara! I will be contacting your for your mailing address!

Posted by Kat at 11:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I have my AC on, it's quite warm outside still, but there's this buzzing noise that is off and on.
Not a mechanical buzz either.
It's like hornets.

I know there are several large hornets nests on that side of the house, and I am terrified to go outside and see if they have built themselves a nest on or in the AC container.
Terrified.
If they are in there, I'm going to have to get some wasp and hornet killer, shut off the AC, and go out there and spray it down, just empty the whole can on the thing.
I have this wicked fear of them coming in through the vents.
I don't know if they can, but I fear it anyway.
Sebastian is deathly allergic to any kid of wasp, hornet, or bee stings. He has severe anaphylactic reactions, swells up, his throat closes, and he can't breathe.
If there are hornets out thee, I have to kill them.
Yikes.

In other news, I will be drawing the winner for the give-a-way in a little bit. Stay tuned.

Posted by Kat at 10:42 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Roy Scheider dies at 75.

Scheider had been treated for multiple myeloma at the hospital's Myeloma Institute for Research and Therapy for the past two years.

Roy Scheider, a two-time Oscar nominee best known for his role as a police chief in the blockbuster movie "Jaws," has died.
He was nominated for a best-supporting actor Oscar in 1971's "The French Connection" in which he played the police partner of Oscar winner Gene Hackman and for best-actor for 1979's "All That Jazz," the autobiographical Bob Fosse film.

However, he was best known for his role in Steven Spielberg's 1975 film, "Jaws," the enduring classic about a killer shark terrorizing beachgoers and well as millions of moviegoers.
Scheider's most famous lines in the movie - "You're gonna need a bigger boat" - was voted No. 35 on the American Film Institutes list of best quotes from U.S. movies.

Posted by Kat at 11:11 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

You have about 40 minutes left to enter my latest give-a-way.
The entries will close at 10pm EST, so hurry!

Posted by Kat at 9:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Hey, it's just like when I was really little, black and white tv...LOL
I got channel 11, CBS, to come in, but it's only coming in, in black and white.
Good enough.
At least I can see it and hear it.
I love music so much so this night is like awesome to me.

I would think it would be so cool to be one of todays musicians, and get the chance to perform with legends ya know?
I know most people don't consider Morris Day and the Time, legends, but they are, and Rhianna got to perform her songs, and with them.
And Beyonce, geez, she kind of annoys me, but she must be thrilled to be able to perform with the one and only Tina Turner.

I get so worked up watching this stuff.
Ahh, to be in that audience seeing it all live.
Someday, maybe I'll get that chance.

Posted by Kat at 9:02 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I really want to watch the Grammys, I love the music award shows, and TOOL is up for best rock performance this year, but damn it, it's on CBS.

That channel is the one channel, that is the hardest to get to come in (no cable) all the time, even worse when the weather is overcast.
I'm going to try and get the channel to tune in, don't care if the picture ends up being black and white, I just want to watch and see who wins, plus the performances are usually very good.

And speaking of music, yesterday I told you we watched Across the Universe.
It was a really great movie, highly recommended, but the music is what got me.
The versions of the songs are so beautiful and well done, I was in awe.
I never knew that Evan Rachel Wood (Marilyn Manson's girlfriend, was in Running with Scissors, The Upside of Anger, The Missing and Thirteen) had that beautiful voice.
Really pretty voice.

But another performance that got me was by T.V. Carpio who played Prudence.
She sang the most beautiful, and most mournful, sad and pleading, version of I wanna hold your hand, I have ever heard.
It's just simply, beautiful.
It's almost painful the way she sings this song, to whoever it is she's singing it to.
You can hear the longing and sadness in her voice, and it just makes me stop and take it all in.
Below is a clip from the movie, her version of I wanna hold your hand.

Posted by Kat at 5:43 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Those are the actual words uttered by Sebastian just a few short minutes ago, over finding the pizza pan in the sink when he wanted to cook a pizza on it.

Me: What do you mean you can't wash that?
Sebastian: It's dirty, gross, you know.
Me: So, take the dish scrubbie and wash that gross stuff away.
Sebastian: But yuck, it's dirty.
Me: Oh for fucks sake! Get outta my way! I wouldn't want your delicate little fingers to get wet or heaven forbid, a little of the gross stuff on them.
Sebastian: Mom, don't be mad.
Me: Don't be mad? It took me all of 30 seconds to wash it and rinse it, for your needs. I don't understand what your problem is with dirty dishes, but you best be getting the hell over it.
Sebastian: Mooom, don't be mad, it was dirty.
Me: And that's my problem how exactly? You were the one who wanted to cook with it.
Sebastian: Cuz it was dirty. The dishes are your thing.
Me: One. More. Word. And I'll show you exactly what my thing is.
Sebastian: *slinks away quietly*

Posted by Kat at 2:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

It's a pretty boring day around here, I've spent time just surfing the net, forums, looking at stuff for my home improvement list that I'll never get to do.
I've looked at some Hansgrohe faucets that I'd love to have in my kitchen and bathroom, shower curtains, paint colors, bedding, all kinds of stuff I'd love to do but no money to do any of it.

I really think it's time to take back my tv, I've had more than enough of the video games today.
I want to watch The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford so bad, but I've been trying to allow them to have a bit of fun. It's been boring, and rainy, and not much to do for any of us.

I don't know though.
Charlie and the Chocolate Factory comes on at 8:30, I've never seen it, so I may watch that instead.
I certainly don't want to rent it, I've heard it's not worth the rental price, but broadcast tv, sure, why not.

Have you done anything fun today?
Any plans for this weekend so I can live vicariously through you?

Posted by Kat at 7:12 PM | Permalink | Comments (5)

On the local forums, this guy who has recently become a single dad, is selling off all of his son's baby furniture.
The baby crib, the changing table, the crib that transforms into a toddler bed, everything.

He's become, how should I say this, somewhat of a nuisance on the forums?
His son is 2 years old, and they are now alone together, his wife left.
Almost every day, he posts a new thread, asking for advice from the other single parents, on how to do this.
You know, how to do this whole single parent thing.
Many of us have told him, we just do it.
Before being stuck at home, I worked and worked. I had to. I didn't have a choice. I worked to pay all the bills because there was no one else.

This guy keeps asking the same questions, just worded differently every time.
How do I do this, how do I do that, where do I go for assistance etc.
We've told him every single time.
He's selling everything he owns to try and make ends meet, I've done that myself. He posts listings to his for sale items, begs people to buy them, then starts complaining that he can't do this single parent thing, it's too hard.

Yes, yes it is, but if he doesn't do it, who will?
Does he want to take the easy way out and give the kid to his wife? Would he rather DCF take the kid?
Every single piece of advice we have given him, he has made an excuse as to why he can't do it.
We're all starting to get a bit frustrated with him because well, we did it, what makes his situations so much different than any of ours?
He has a job, he just needs to find a suitable, affordable daycare, and maybe a second job to pay for it all.
We've even told him where to go and who to call to get help paying for daycare.
There are programs that offer subsides for single parents, and he's making excuses why he can't go there to get it.
His biggest excuse is they don't help single dads.
One of the other single dads, has told him that's not true, they help any parent, male or female, within certain income brackets.
But this guy then comes up with another excuse.
Frustrating doesn't even begin to describe how we're all feeling about this right now.
It's almost like he wants the help, but wants someone to just give it to him, not have to go anywhere or do anything to get it.
It sucks being a single parent, but if you don't do it, who will?

And speaking of single dads, why don't you check out my newest give-a-way?

Posted by Kat at 3:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I spent the better half of the morning watching infomercials for xtreme cookware and steam cleaners, and directbuy showrooms.

Then the mail came and brought us today's Netflix selections.
I picked out The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford, and Sebastian chose Across the Universe.

Set in America during the Vietnam War, Across the Universe is a powerful love story set against a backdrop of political and social unrest: it's a story of soul-searching, self-doubt, and individual powerlessness cleverly conveyed through a multitude of Beatles songs.

Posted by Kat at 1:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I finally have all my tax papers so I can go file, I have to pay some taxes, but I also have some deductions so it won't be so bad.
I have an appointment next week to finally start looking into life insurance rates and hopefully find something reasonable that I can afford.
I've slacked on doing this for so long, but with a tax return coming, I'll be at least able to make a few payments on it ahead of time.

I'm seriously bored tonight.
Sebastian fell asleep about an hour ago, and Mark is playing PSU, and I've just been surfing the net, bored out of my skull.

But if you all like to read and want a free and really great book to read, enter the latest give-a-way I have going.
You have until Sunday night to enter, so why not?

Posted by Kat at 10:46 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Trey Ellis is an African-American single father, blogger, and author.
He shared with me a copy of his latest book Bedtime Stories: Adventures in the Land of Single-Fatherhood.
I received it last week, and spent time reading it cover to cover.
What I found was something I wasn't expecting.

Book description from Amazon,

How is a single dad supposed to navigate a new girlfriend into and out of his California king without his son or daughter noticing? For Trey Ellis, steering his way through the unfamiliar nuances of the contemporary dating scene is sometimes a nerve-racking exercise in intra-familial spycraft. But the rewards of being a dad, as any parent knows, easily outweigh any hardships. In a world where African-American fathers are relentlessly portrayed as absent without leave, this irresistible memoir is both a tribute to all those loving, nurturing, black men who are undaunted by the responsibilities of fatherhood and an utterly charming male nonfiction.

Trey Ellis is a loving, caring, single father trying to find his way, find a way to pick up the pieces of his life after his wife left, and find someone to love again, all the while being a great dad to his children.
It's an honest memoir, right down to some embarrassing moments that all single parents face. I found myself shocked at how honest he was, but nodding along, even laughing, saying to myself, oh gawd, I've had that happen to me!
The modern dating scene for single parents, is nerve-wracking, and if you do start dating, what about the kids? When do you introduce them, how, should you do it at all? Ack!
Changing diapers, frozen dinners, those moments late at night when it's just you, your thoughts, and a can of pepsi. Those moments when you wonder if you're strong enough to do this and then realize, you have to no matter what.

I thoroughly enjoyed this wonderful memoir, and I know my single parent, and non-single parent readers alike, will love it as well.
That's why I'm having another give-a-way.
If you would like to have this book, all you have to do is leave a comment on this post between now and Sunday February 10th, at 10pm EST.
I will close the comments, and draw a winner on Monday morning.
That's it, no complicated rules, just leave a comment saying you'd like to have it.
Please make sure your email address is valid, and that you can provide a mailing address if you are the winner.
Your information is protected in accordance with my privacy policy.
It's a really great book, honest, heart-warming, real.

Thank you so much Trey for sharing it with me. And now with my readers.
Many wishes for much success.

Posted by Kat at 1:06 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

I do a lot of shopping on line, and I used to shop at Buy.com all the time, don't really know why I stopped, but I have since rediscovered why I used to shop there, and why buy.com rocks so much.

Some of the reasons they rock, are professional as well as actual customer reviews.
I love honest reviews of products by real users. To me, there is no better way to find out the truth about a product than to hear it from real people.

Another reason is the great selection and the best prices, as well as comparison prices right on the item page.
You know with one glance, if Buy.com has the lower better price, in most cases they do.
There's deal of the day, monthly celebrity spokespersons who make their own funny and informative commercials.
I figured if Howie Mandel and Ryan Seacrest were making commercials, I could too.
Below you'll see a little video the kids and threw together, with reasons why I think Buy.com rocks.

So if you haven't ever shopped there, (new customers get an additional $10 off with Google checkout) or if it's been awhile since you have, go back and discover your reasons why buy.com rocks!

Posted by Kat at 12:52 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

I woke up this morning with the teens to send them off to school, and I was in agony. Absolute freaking agony.
I thought perhaps I slept wrong as I hobbled to the bathroom and attempted to sit down on the thrown.
It hurt to bend so I could sit, what the hell did I do to myself this time?

Nothing.
It started raining about 30 minutes ago, like a monsoon.
That explains it.
Cold and rainy, means I spend the time in pain.
I thought about going and putting on my back brace. It would help keep all the muscles in perfect place, so I wouldn't end up twisting them even further, causing more pain.
You remember the brace right?
This big, bulky thing.

What would be really awesome is if they made braces thinner, out of a thin, but tight material, with boning and support, kinda like bustiers, but with the type of support a corset offers, but safe for back patients.
The brace is just too bulky, and a real pain in the butt to put on and take off.
Something much thinner needs to be made.
Make it out of plastic if they have to, but much, much thinner.
I'm sure it can be done, someone just needs to do it.
Maybe a fabric material, but with a plastic back piece, or something.
I don't know.
If there's any inventors or medical people out there reading this, get cracking on this idea, you can totally take it, but I get to test it or have it named after me.
See, women with back problems would actually wear our back braces more if they weren't so damned bulky and ugly.
Give us something thinner, stylish, comfortable, and we'll wear them all the time.
I want to put mine on because I know it will help with the pain, but it's just too much trouble.

Posted by Kat at 8:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Coming off with the weight that is.
I am so determined to lose this extra weight I've put on.
I get more and more excited as my workouts progress, I start off slow, but build up speed.
I want to be able to kick it up to the next tension, but I want to have the first tension mastered on all the various workouts before I move up.

There are 10 different workouts that you can do on each tension level, so I want to complete them all on tension 1, before I move up to level 2.
The weight is coming off, it's slow going with that, and some have suggested I try some supplements to help speed it up like maybe an eca stack, or one of those many other ones you can pick up at Walgreen's or other vitamin stores.
I used to do those kinds of things back in the day, and I would like the weight to come off a wee bit faster, but because I take different medications, 2 of them being depressants in a way, I need to be careful.
I'd definitely have to ask my doctor if they are safe for me to use or not, but that's something I can discuss with him at my next appointment.

But ya know, I feel so good right now, I feel better, have a bit more energy, still not sleeping properly, but in time I hope that will change as my body becomes more fit.
I have some hand weights, just one pounders, that I can use while working out. You don't have to hold the handle bars or the pulse rate handles, you can swing your arms on your own, so maybe I'll throw in some hand weights into my workouts, get a better upper body workout while my lower body gets it's groove on.

I have close to 300 mp3's on my mp3 player, all hard rock or fast beat, to keep me pumped up and motivated.
Classic rock, new rock, speed metal, and even some death metal on there.
I get so wired out when a song comes on by Dimmu Borgir.
Man, it is some seriously intense music, especially when I'm already flying at a fast pace.
I hope to be down to my goal weight of 145-150, by June.
I think I can do it, I know I can.

Posted by Kat at 8:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

One of my hopes from all this working out on my elliptical I'm doing, the physical and massage therapy, and eating better, is to get back in my shoes.
I have the most awesome pair of platform shoes, that I have not been able to wear in like 6 years now.
I adore these!
Yes, they are a bit dusty, they haven't been worn in ages, so they sit on my shoe rack, waiting for the day that my back and legs are strong enough to allow me to walk in these again.

They have a 4 inch heel on them, they are super comfortable, and they are just awesome looking in my opinion.
I want to get back in these, and someday, I will.
Oh yes, I WILL wear them again.

Posted by Kat at 5:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Colleen bought two pairs of pants at Old Navy, she tried one pair on, bought another pair in the same style but different color.
On the day she wanted to wear the second pair, she noticed some other woman's vaginal discharge in the crotch.
Please go to Digg, read her story, digg it to the top.
It's awesome what's she doing with the pants now because ON treated her badly when she went to return them.

But I laughed, and I know you'll be laughing, but see, I know how this happened.
I used to work at Old Navy, I know their return policies, and where the products come from.

I worked mostly in the stock room bringing in shipments off the truck.
It was my job to unpack it, hang it on the hangers, place it on the floor.
I also covered the fitting rooms and helped put returned items back out.

First, ALL of Old Navy's items are made over seas. This should be a major hint to wash anything you buy from them.
Why?
Many times I would open a box and spiders would be in the clothes, or fleas.
Sometimes, I'd get done hanging over 200 pieces, and my arms would be itchy. I'd look down to find a major rash going on, on my arms.
From whatever was in the box.

In the fitting rooms, there was a sign up that said you must keep your underwear on while trying on clothes, but uh, sometimes the female customers wouldn't be wearing any.
That's the first way the crusty stain could have happened.
Yes, we could tell them they couldn't try on any more clothes after we saw nakedness, but that might cause a scene, and getting our manager involved in it was something the manager didn't like to do.
Heck, they didn't even like to get involved in blatant shoplifting exchanges.
The second way, is when items are returned.
All the Old Navy employees are required to do, is ask why you are returning it, and give the item a once over for outside damage to the outside of the garment.
We never were told to check pockets or look inside the crotch of the pants.
Simply look for outside stains or tears.
That's it.
That's the second way the stain could have happened, but she said the pants were new, so I'm betting on the fitting room scenario.

What did we do with returned items?
We hung them on hangers and placed them back on the sales floor of course!
Same with items from the fitting rooms that the customers didn't want.
In there, we never even inspected the items after they tried them on.
They were "new" after all.
We placed them back on the hangers, and on to the sales floor they went.

I've worked in retail and customer service for years.
The customer is always right even when they are wrong.
By thoroughly inspecting items and finding a stain like that, could cause the customer to start screaming that they didn't do it, that we must have sold it to them that way, they demand their money back, all at full on screech decibel, which causes other customers to leave the store.
It's best policy, and it was Old Navy's policy, to just inspect the outside of the garments and return their money, no other questions asked, then place the item back on the sales floor with no further inspections.

Old Navy hated to lose money.
Their items were cheap as it was, having to mark off an item, meant the store lost money, and I know for a fact at my store, that items that smelled like smoke, alcohol, coffee stains, baby throw-up, and other assorted problems, were placed back on the sales floor all the time.
The only items we ever marked off, we ones right off the truck, and usually only if they were broken.
But we'd even sell them, after writing it off as a loss.
We'd mark it down 20% and stick it in the clearance bin as is.

Colleen's story is funny and gross, but nothing new to people who worked in retail.
It doesn't matter what you buy and where, always wash it, spray that new purse down with Lysol, take a Clorox wipe to new toys.
You'd be surprised and sickened by what those of us in the retail field know about the clothes you just bought.
Wash them.
In hot soapy water with a bleach alternative if you can.
Some of the critters we came across, gave us the itchies and a rash that needed a doctor to treat.

Posted by Kat at 3:31 PM | Permalink | Comments (7)

is something that I would really love to do in this house if I can.
I would love to get a real desk, something more up to date, like much more modern office furniture, have a real file cabinet as well.

I work from home around the clock, and my papers tend to get misplaced because my filing system is a little less than desirable, and I'd love to have an actual desk to work at.
The way things are right now, my desk which is actually a very old hutch, holds my monitor and mouse, and it's in the living room.
Where the tv and game system are, I get distracted by movies or games from time to time, when I should be 100% devoted to my work.
I know I'd be far more productive in an office, with real office supplies in an orderly fashion.
I have so much to do today, and I'm trying like heck to get it all done.

Posted by Kat at 11:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

There's a thread I've been following on the local forums this morning, about a girlfriend who says she's lost physical attraction in her boyfriend because of a hair cut.
I can't share the pictures with you because these are people I know, I have no permission to share them with you.

But the boyfriend had one of those sorta spikey haircuts, all standing up, he had on a flashy button down shirt, some gold jewelry around his neck, in the before picture.
In the after picture, he was wearing a t-shirt, shaved his head bald, and had an eyebrow ring in.

I understand the after look isn't for everyone, but he is his own man, has a right to shave his head if he so chooses, but she is very upset by this, thinks he should have asked her before he did it, so she could have talked him out of it.

I really am of the opinion that he is his own man, dating or married, we are still our own persons, and we can do what we like with our hair.
It will grow back anyway.
But some people are of the belief that you should ask your SO or spouse, before doing anything to your physical appearance, because they may not like it.
The fact is, that the SO likes it, they wanted to do it, it's their body, their choice.

What do you think?
Would you make your SO ask basically what amounts to your permission, before they can cut or color their hair?

Posted by Kat at 11:19 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

My neighbor man came home tonight with a whole bunch of stuff in the back of his pickup, and tied to his truck rack.
What kind of stuff?
Stuff his wife didn't want, but he insisted she make room for.

He came home with it all, they argued about the pile of crap as she calls it, and he won the battle, unloaded it in the house, and left for the bar.
He warned her first, that it must all be put away when he comes home.
She called me up, told me what he brought and what he said, and told me to come take a look.

I went over and yup, it is indeed crap.
Old dining chairs that are in really bad shape, another television that probably doesn't work, a big padded foot stool with worn and faded fabric, and a set of old pots and pans, and many more items like knick knacks and old lamps.
He thinks it's all good stuff of course, she thinks it's junk and I agree.
No clue what she'll do with it all, but she probably has until about 11pm to figure it out.

Crazy junk collecting man.

Posted by Kat at 8:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

Has anyone ever told you how much teenage boys suck?
They have?
I have?
Well, if they keep up the crap they are currently doing, they will die before reaching their eighteenth birthdays.

The teens are coming into their own, they have their own ideas and thoughts, growing up.
Yay, that's all fine and dandy, but if their mouths keep running like they are, their lips are gonna get knocked clear into next week.

I had that nice back massage today, I had a semi-decent day.
Then they came home.
Now I'm considering asking my therapist if they have hot tubs for patient use, so I can come soak away the stress.
He gave me an awesome neck massage, I was feeling great, now my neck muscles are so tense, one slap to my face, my whole head would probably snap off.

Sebastian is being sarcastic and mouthy to me, Mark is being sarcastic and mouthy to him, which makes Sebastian turn around and be all mouthy back.
It's just going in circles now.
All I asked was a simple question, and I'm getting the most obnoxious answers back.
I'm ready to kill them!

Awhile back, Mark said the most hateful thing to me, and I just turned and said I love you, and then locked myself in the bathroom and cried.
Sebastian is starting to say the same hateful and hurtful things, and for what reason?
Am I some wicked horrible mother?
No!
I go out of my way to make sure they are happy and have the things that keep them happy, and clothes, and food, and fun stuff, while I wear the same 6 black t-shirts I bought myself one at a time on sale for the cheap, so they could come first.
They are being rude, mean, and un-greatful, and I'm over it!
If it doesn't stop, all the things they have, shall be wiped off the face of the earth with the fat end of a hammer.
They have been warned, they know I mean business, all it's going to take tonight is one more sarcastic anything.
I dare them.
I triple dog dare them.

Posted by Kat at 6:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (6)

The massage was nice, weird, but nice.
I haven't had a real back massage in ages because my back has had some major issues, and it sort of still does, so it's just weird for me.

We did some range of motion tests first, to find the areas he needs to work on, and then it was time to remove my shirt, bra, and shorts, and get under the sheet, face down.
Um what?
See folks, years since I've had a real back massage.
I am pretty sure I almost bolted when he said to pretty much strip.
Yes, it was a 'he', so yeah, that made it even weirder for me.
I can't explain why, I'm just a freak.
I mean, do you have any idea how many people have seen all my girly bits in the last few years?
Tons of them!
And here I am all freaked out by one male masseuse.
Sheesh.

So I do what he said, and my back is hypersensitive, I warn him of this, and he gets to work.
I thought I was gonna freak out.
Pins and needles galore!
But he put some numbing cream on my back, and after a few minutes, all better.
Then he did some deep tissue massage which is kinda painful.
Owie.
But my hip does feel better, my lower back is feeling not too bad either.
When I got up after the hour long session, my neck and entire back, snap, crackled and popped, like a box of rice krispies.

I came home, did my 20 minutes on the elliptical, answered some emails and posted a few places, and now I'm gonna get some lunch.
And then I'm going to attempt to figure out where my feed went.
It's vanished yo.
Maybe all the posts will show up at once again, who knows.

Posted by Kat at 1:07 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I have a doc appointment this morning, for a massage.
That's right, one part of my new PT involves getting a massage twice a week.

I'm not super big on massages, I tend to get nervous and tense up, which defeats the whole purpose of getting a massage.
But I will go and try it at least.
I honestly don't know how this is going to go because of the sensitivity issues in my back.
I still have very little touch sensation on the top layer of skin, but if any type of pressure, even just placing a single finger and pressing lightly, I get massive sensations shooting through my whole back.
The nerves have not fully regrown since surgery, and it's quite a unique feeling.
I can't even really describe it well.
A single finger, pressing just barely, feels like thousands of needles being poked simultaneously into my entire back.
It doesn't matter where the press takes place, the entire back feels that way.
A massage could potentially send me into fits of agony on the massage table.
If that happens, I'll just have to cancel the rest of them due to hypersensitivity, but I'm keeping my fingers crossed I'll be able to tolerate it, because those lower back muscles are so tight all the time, they need to be worked on.

Then I'll come home, work out on the elliptical, finish the house stuff I need to, and hope that the forms and other papers I've been expecting, finally show up.
The mail is still screwed up.
Nothing again yesterday, not even the usual Tuesday junk mail fliers.

Posted by Kat at 8:23 AM | Permalink | Comments (1)

Just want to say sorry if you ended up getting like 15 feeds from me all at once, a few minutes ago.
I was trying to fix something in my xml source, and when I did, it caused feedburner to send out my last 15 posts all at once, at 11:07pm.
Really sorry about that.

Something happened where some of my posts showed up in my feed reader as just content summaries, and others were the full posts.
I went in and fixed the issue, but then it shot out all those posts.
I gasped like wicked loud, and screamed too.
"Oh no! That's like major post floodage! Ack!"

Sebastian asked why I screamed, I tell him, and he goes "Mom, you're such a freaking nerd. Step away from the box every now and then ok?"
So I said to him; "Yeah buddy, you step away from the xbox for a whole day, and I'll step away from my desk for a whole day. Deal?"
He says; "Are you crazy?!?"
"Uh-huh, just what I thought, now shush boy!"
He laughed and went back to getting his back pack ready for school tomorrow.

And speaking of school tomorrow, please oh please, do not let what happened this morning happen again tomorrow morning.
As I said on Sunday, I haven't gotten much sleep.
Last night, it caught up with me, so when the alarm went off this morning, I rolled over, turned on my lava lamp, shut off the alarm, and dozed back to sleep.
I woke in a jolting panic just a few minutes later, but damn, what if I hadn't?
I would have woken up hours later probably, and the kids would have totally missed school.
If they are later than 9am, they are not allowed to go to school that day unless they have a doctors note as the reason they were late, like an early morning appointment is the only valid excuse for being later than 9am.
I now have set both my radio alarm clock and my cell phone alarm, in hopes that if it does happen again, one or the other alarm, will wake me again so they can get out of here and go to school.
Not only do they need to go to school, but I need them to go for my own sanity.

Posted by Kat at 11:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Sebastian and I went to the grocery store today, we needed food and trash bags, and some other household goods.
I had to stop in at Pak Mail to send out a package because it didn't go on Friday like it should have, and yesterday was just not the day. (sorry for the lateness, but it's coming!) $28 bucks later, the package is en route.

We were walking down the sidewalk to head into Publix, and there's this young employee from Papa Johns standing on the sidewalk with a small pizza box.
He stops us and asks if we'd like to try their new cinnamon sweet sticks.
Sebastian was all over that, and I hadn't eaten all day, so I took one too.
OMG, yum.
It is a little dough stick covered in this buttery-drizzled cinnamon stuff, then drizzled with a vanilla frosting.
So so good.

We went in and bought all the groceries we needed, and I stepped on the scale.
Another pound lost!
W00t!
I seriously love having the elliptical in my house.
I have zero excuses as to why I can't work out.
I can't say well, I just don't want to go to a gym today, or it's raining and I can't go for a walk, or too cold, or too hot, no excuses, and I'm doing great!
My left hip is always sore of course, but I'm building up my strength in my lower back and legs.
I pop in my earbuds, crank up my mp3 player, and just go with it.
The weight may be coming off slowly, but it took me a few years to pack it on, so I don't expect it to just fall off in a month.
The weight loss is really great, I feel better about myself because of that, but knowing that my back and legs are getting stronger, that I can do more, stand for longer periods of time, walk longer distances without having to stop and rest, is so so awesome.
This elliptical really has made a major difference in my life already, and I haven't had it that long yet.
It's a good thing going on here, and I intend on keeping it up.

Posted by Kat at 9:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I wanted to update you all on what I've learned since making my post about the new service Buzzfuse, the other day.

It was a paid post for another company, and some of my blogging friends are obviously hard up for $5, so they did what they had to do to get paid.
The opp required them to sign up and submit an article, but before you can do that, you have to enter in the email addresses of 10 of your friends.
Not cool at all.

I posted about the situation on a forum, and learned exactly how I got spammed by Buzzfuse.
To show you how this went down, here's a bit of how it works from other bloggers who almost took this low paying piece of shit opp.

"I had actually taken it (the opp) and was going through the process of signing up and submitting something I wanted to promote, when it put up an alert box saying that I could not continue until I entered 10 email addresses of people to "invite" them to the thing. (I had chosen to skip that step in signup)."

"According to the info, in order to use their service, you must submit a video, picture, article, post or whatever you want promoted. So I started to do that. But you cannot even get to the submitting part without entering all ten email addresses."

Garreth from Buzzfuse replied to my post, I replied to his comment, he tells me this isn't spam for the following reason;
"Well, I understand your frustration. Your friends didn't have to put your name in, but I guess they did because they trusted you to review their work and give them feedback (and of course you have!). The point again is that its not so much about making money from their post as it marketing their ongoing posts or testing our system, and these are personal invites, so they are not spam."

Garreth, it's spam plain and simple.
They took the $5 opp because they needed money, they had to use your service and review it in order to get paid. That meant they had to complete all the steps which included entering 10 of their friends in to be invited.
I didn't ask for 5 invitations, they were sent on behalf of my blogging friends from your site, just so they could get paid.

You can say it's not spam, but sorry Garreth, a spade is a spade is a spade.
They did it to make money, not intentionally piss off 10 of their friends.

The requirement of entering in the email addresses of 10 friends, before you can submit an article to Buzzfuse to promote it, is pure and utter crap.
I would never just willingly enter the email addresses of my friends to promote an article I want to gain publicity.
I'll ask my friends to Stumble it, or Digg it, IF they want to.
I won't invite them to a service without telling them about it first, asking them if it's ok if they receive an email from a company they haven't used.
If they say no, then it's no.
Making it a requirement is just evil.

Stumble this post if you like it.
If not, it's cool.
That's how I promote my posts, by asking, not spamming.
Hint, hint Garreth.

Posted by Kat at 11:09 AM | Permalink | Comments (4)

My friend Holly, sat at home and waited all day, and into the night now, for 2 very large packages to be delivered from FedEx.
She is expecting a memory foam mattress and base, they are in two separate boxes because of the size, and it was all worked out that they be delivered today because it's her only day off this week.
FedEx has not delivered them, and doesn't know when they will be.

The reason FedEx says they could not deliver them today was because according to their computer, the weather in her area was very bad today. Severe weather alerts.
She even told them that wasn't true, it was a beautiful sunny day today, the weather alert is for tomorrow.

She has now emailed back and forth with five (5) different customer service reps, who have all asked her the same questions over and over again.

The website tracking for FedEx, says that one of her packages is on a truck for delivery for today, and the other for tomorrow, but now that the weather alert is for tomorrow, who knows when her bed will actually be delivered.
A supervisor finally admitted that the package that is saying will be delivered tonight, won't be.

Holly has two big problems.
Both she and her husband are working every day the rest of this week, and it is supposed to be raining really badly tomorrow, when FedEx says they will deliver them. If no one is home, they said they will leave them at the door.
Holly has no porch or covered area to protect them from the rain, her bed and bed frame will be absolutely ruined.
But FedEx doesn't really know for sure, if they will be delivered tomorrow, that's just a guess.

I seriously hate bad customer service. hate it.
She worked with the company the bed is coming from to secure delivery for today, it was all scheduled, and as usual, FedEx screwed it up.
I know so many people who hate FedEx for this reason, and others like, not knocking, just leaving the package at the door, or driveway, placed in uncovered areas, or in the case of one of my deliveries of contact lenses a few years ago, the wrong house on the wrong street, and the customer signed my name for them and kept them.
FedEx admitted they took them to the wrong house and they were signed for, so the contact lens company had to resend them at FedEx's cost.

Just last month, Christine ordered a phone from Virgin Mobile, FedEx delivered it to the wrong house, it was signed for, a forged signature, and Virgin had to file a claim and refund her money.

The companies who use Fedex to ship, need to stop shipping with them and use another company for shipping.
FedEx repeatedly loses packages, is late, or delivers them to the wrong address.
It's time for companies to just stop using them.

Posted by Kat at 9:32 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

The mail came, and none of it was mine.
My mailbox has HUGE numbers on it, my name is clearly written inside my mailbox, as a matter of fact, it says 'COOPER ONLY' on the inside.

What came in todays mail?
9 pieces of mail for a house 3 doors down.
A name on the envelopes that doesn't even remotely sound, or even spelled close to COOPER.

I called the post office and asked if my route has a new driver.
The guy who answered put me on hold, then came back and said yes, and asked me why.
I explained that I received mail for a house name and number, 3 doors down, and none of my own mail.
He said he'd report it to that drivers supervisor.
I said ok, that's all well and good, but where is MY mail?
I am expecting tax forms and other important documents this week.
We take the mail that isn't ours, and give it to the rightful owners.
Other people don't always do that.
They sometimes throw it out, or write return to sender on it.
If some of these papers I'm expecting get returned to sender, it's going to cause problems for me.
These are time sensitive documents.
I need them.

The guy said he doesn't know where my mail is, but the supervisor will deal with the new driver and tell him about his mistakes.
That doesn't answer my question, all I can do is hope my mail is not lost.

Posted by Kat at 1:09 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

So we were having the BBQ and watching one of the most intense and well fought super bowl games I've witnessed in a long time, when things got a little exciting right here in my own hood.

The duplex to the direct right of me, the one where the drug dealer just recently moved out of, has new tenants.
They have been in there for about 2, maybe 3 weeks now.
Anyway, we're all cheering, screaming at the tv, eating ribs, wings, pasta salad, deviled eggs, beverages of all kinds, and then we hear screaming of a different kind.

The woman in the duplex, was screaming in pain, the man, be he her boyfriend or spouse, is unknown to any of us, is yelling and screaming back.
Things are being thrown and smashed, dogs are barking, and someone dialed 9-1-1.

At first, just one cruiser showed up with an ambulance for possible injuries in a domestic dispute.
Then another cruiser, and another, and another.
We were all told to get in our houses, so the teens and I came back in ours, Dave went back in his with the rest of his guests.
Within just 7 minutes, there were 9 cruisers and 2 swat vehicles, and the ambulance, and a K-9 unit. They were lined up in front of my plex and that plex, and 3 cruisers were in my driveway.
All the officers were in tactical positions, guns drawn, and aimed at the front door and windows of that duplex.

The man was now holding the woman hostage with some kind of weapon.
It took from the end of the 1st quarter of the game, until the beginning of the last quarter of the game, to get the situation under control.
An officer finally had gotten in the back door of the plex, and got up behind the man, tackled him and disabled the weapon.
The woman was taken by ambulance to the hospital, and the man was cuffed and dragged out by 5 officers.

I was able to watch the entire thing go down from my driveway, no photos, I did try, and got yelled at to turn the camera off and get in a safe position behind a vehicle.
When it was all over, an officer came and apologized for disturbing our super bowl party, but they had to take tactical positions around the property, and that required no citizens to be in the back yards or peering out windows.
I was only allowed to stay in my own driveway because 2 officers and their vehicles were in it, and I stayed behind them.

Between this all, I kept going in and out and checking on the game, the teens did watch it for me and kept me posted through the screen door.
I got to see the awesome last quarter, and am so freaking impressed with how well both teams fought their asses off.
I couldn't believe how it ended, but wow, a damn exciting game.
17-14, un-fucking-real.
Congratulations to the Giants, and well played to the Patriots.
They fought like hell, they should be proud of their season, and how hard they played tonight.

How was your night and super bowl party?

Posted by Kat at 10:41 PM | Permalink | Comments (8)

Ok let's see, the teens slept over my sisters house on Friday night, I laid staring at the ceiling until about 6am, and then only slept until 9am.

Last night, Susan stayed over, and once again I couldn't get to sleep.
I was awake the entire night, all day today until 2pm, and I only slept until 3:45pm.
So in the last 48 hours, I've slept a grand total of 4 hours and 45 minutes.
I knew this was going to happen without the Ambiens, but I was taking an insanely high dosage of those every night, and that's no good at all.
I'll have to force myself into a sleeping pattern again. It's rough, it will take me about a week to do it, but eventually I'll sleep for at least 5 hours a night.

We will be watching the game this evening and chowing down on some BBQ and other snacks, with my neighbor Dave out back, and a bunch of his friends. He invited us to come hang.
He does this every year, so it's nice. He's a huge Patriots fan too.
We were just going to have some wings, chips, dip, that kind of stuff, but a big ol' BBQ is much more fun.
I'll probably be back and forth talking about the game, commercials, and checking in on stuff all night, because I just can't sit still.
There will be other kids and I believe I even saw a few teenage boys back there, so I know the teens won't feel awkward hanging with a bunch of adults.

Will you be watching? Who are you hoping wins?
What will you be eating?

Posted by Kat at 5:40 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

My sister came down with my teens in tow, bringing Susan and some McDonald's too.
We ate, and then we made our way over to Gamestop to pick up the wireless adapter, and Publix to get tp and cat litter, and some food.

The boys traded in 9 old games they no longer play anymore, and knocked off $37.62 of the total price.
Then I dug through my wallet and found an old EB Games card that had some credit on it. I figured it was like maybe $10 at the most, I hadn't used it in over 2 years, and couldn't recall how much value, if any at all was still on it.
The guy ran it through, and said that it had $27.02 on it, and would I like that added to lower the price of the Xbox 360 Wireless Network Adapter as well.
I said heck yeah! Anything to bring that $100 price tag down.

So between the games and the card, we knocked $64.64 off the price of the adapter, making the total price my sister had to pay just $42.35.
She was so greatful for that. She wanted to get the boys that very expensive piece they needed, and I certainly couldn't afford it, so helping bring that price down made her smile.
And of course the teens are thrilled. They missed being able to play their games live since the power transformer blew out on the 19th of January.
It wasn't until January 23rd, when I got the new modem/router from Verizon, that I realized what happened to the xbox's ethernet port.
When the transformer blew, it caused a massive power surge that killed the ethernet port, my phone, my answering machine, and my router as well as the old modem I had.
I'm truly lucky that it didn't just kill the entire xbox.

So the boys are totally happy, and as soon as I got the adapter hooked up and entered the WEP key, they were back online and playing Rock Band.
Susan is here and loves music, so she wanted to try it.
She was truly awesome at Ballroom Blitz.

And now my little cutie pie is in bed, fast asleep.
We ate and played, and giggled and tickled, and ran, and laughed, and read a book before bed.
She's just so awesome. I love having her here.
I get to be mommy-like again.
You know, play goofy, read silly bedtime stories, play silly games.
The teens look at me really funny if I try to read The Cat in the Hat out loud to them like I used to.
The cat has a voice, the fish has a voice, and I just have so much fun reading it to little kids, and the teens, are definitely not little any more.
Now they are as grumpy as the fish in the pot.

Posted by Kat at 8:13 PM | Permalink | Comments (2)

I have so much to do, and what am I doing?
I'm sitting here playing on the net.
Actually not playing, I had to look up some stuff so I could connect the boys to the modem/router through wireless later today.
That involved finding the damn connection page for verizon. I could not remember what it was at all.
I got it now, all will good.

I need to vac the rugs and stuff like that, my niece Susan is coming to spend the night with us.
I need to get to the store and get cat litter, tp, a little bit of food.
I am so freaking broke right now.
I just yesterday, paid my doc appointment co-pays, picked up all my meds, and had to get the boys lunch and something for me for dinner, and I think I have a whole $65 bucks left to buy the above and food, for a whole week and a half.
uh huh.
Looks like ramen and pb and j time for a little bit.
Things are just super tight and work ha slowed down a bit, not sure why, but I could really use some more work right now.
I hate being broke like this, it stresses me oooooout man.
I'll survive though.
Oh, and I am not buying the teens the wireless thingy they need, sis is, so yeah, not coming out of my empty pockets.

I'm so tired too. I was awake till like 6am. I just laid on the couch watching stupid infomercials and crappy movies.
I did get some new Netflix stuff today, but we won't be watching it with Susan here.
I picked episodes 1 and 2 of HBO's Rome.
Everyone said it was really good. If it sucks, I'll just send them back and cancel the remaining episodes.
No biggie especially now that there are so many movies you can just watch right on line.

Ok, gotta go. Lots of cleaning and stuff to do.
Later days!

Posted by Kat at 2:08 PM | Permalink | Comments (0)

Ok, in the last few days, I have gotten not 1, not 2, but 5 emails requesting I join my blogging friends on Buzzfuse.

Someone want to explain what it is and why I should join it?
I know it was a paid blogging thing for a company, I saw the paid for by Buzzfuse banners on a few posts this past week. (Hey, look at that. A free link!)
But did those of you who got paid to promote it, actually join because it's good, or because they paid you to join and invite your friends, and my email was in the list?

So tell me what it is, and if you really love it, and why I should join.
You sent me the invite, is it worth my time or no?

Posted by Kat at 12:31 AM | Permalink | Comments (3)

I tend to do weird things when I am home alone and bored.
Yes, I could be answering the 60 something emails in my inbox, but this seemed far more fun at the moment.
I will get to them though, in just a minute.
All pics are clickable for bigger.

I don't have crows feet, but a lot of under eye wrinkles.
I'll be 38 this March.

So close you can see my contact.

Grey hairs which will be dyed away tomorrow.

A single grey hair up close in the mirror.

Posted by Kat at 9:22 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

I knew the teens wouldn't be home tonight, so I only picked up something for myself for dinner tonight, and chose this pizza, the Digiorno- Pizza- Microwave rising crust four cheese flavor.
It looked good, it says 9.9oz, big box, price $3.99, says it's 2 servings.
I figured I could eat half for dinner, and half for lunch tomorrow.
Yes, it's totally bad for me, coming in at 370 calories a serving, and 2 servings per package.
Half tonight, half for lunch tomorrow. I could work it off.
Uh-huh.
Check this.
The box size is incredibly deceiving.

That's a huge difference in size of box and size of the actual product.
I thought if the pizza is that big, then the calories for 2 servings would be legit right? Wrong.

Look at the size of the thing!
Ok, so a total rip off on the size, but maybe the taste will be worth it.
I cook it on the special box thingy and with the special crisping ring thingy you place on top of the pizza, for 5 minutes like it says.
At just 4 minutes, I smelled burning.
I took it out of the microwave and it had burned the whole way around where the special "crisping ring" was placed on top of the pizza.

I figure I'll just eat the middle of this tiny, now burnt, little pizza.
It tasted like garbage.
The crust tasted like just pure flour, no seasoning, no flavor.
The sauce was salty, oh my word salty.
And the cheese was gross.
I tossed it in the trash after one bite.
It was that bad.

Save your money folks, the Totinos pizzas have more flavor and cook better than these things do.

Posted by Kat at 7:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (3)

My doc appointment went great!
We are still working on cutting down on the amount of narcotic pain relievers my old pain doc had me taking, and I feel so much better about myself because of it.

Did I ever give you guys the amount of pills my old pain doc (Doc F.) had me taking every day?
He had me taking 12, 10mg/325mg, Lortabs every single day.
I was a walking talking stoned out of mind opiate user.

My new doc, just since December, has gotten me down to just 4 a day.
That's so awesome!
I take just 4 a day of those now, 2 muscle relaxers, (down from 6 a day) and all those other drugs he had me on, are completely gone.
Gone.
I am no longer taking 13 separate drugs a day now.
Just two.
It's incredible to me how different these two pain doctors are.
Doc F. had me taking sleeping pills, testosterone, high potency and high dose opiates, high potency and high dose muscle relaxers, vitamins, and various supplements.
I feel so so much better being off all that junk.
I still have trouble sleeping, but if I take one of the muscle relaxers about an hour before I want to go to bed, I actually am tired enough to doze off within just a few hours instead of laying there bug eyed all night long.
Even with the sleeping pills, I had trouble sleeping, so it's nice to be off the 30mg Ambien.
Those things are dangerous to take all the time.

I was there for a wicked long time, he got backed up, but after I left I went straight to Walgreen's, the teens met me there with a friend, we went and picked up some Publix subs for them, and then I hopped on the scale.
Down 3 more pounds!
My starting weight was 192, then I lost 2.5 pounds, and now 3 more, so a total weight loss of 5.5 pounds now.
Yay!
186.5lbs and dropping!
W00t!
Losing weight feels great combined with everything else I am doing health-wise, so it's a huge motivator to keep on going with my daily exercise.

The teens are going to my sisters house for the night, so I'll be able to not only catch up on my work, but I'll have total peace and quiet for the night.
Yeusss!

Posted by Kat at 3:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (4)

Waiting Stil.jpg
Originally uploaded by onecattykat

Posted by Kat at 11:57 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)

I'm off to the docs this morning.
Time for the monthly check in and med evaluation for pain levels.
Then I'll be heading to Walgreen's and Publix to do the shopping and I'll hit the scale.
I don't expect to have lost too much weight, but then again, between the flu and working out on the elliptical, maybe I have.
It'll be exciting to find out anyway.

Yeah, I have pushed myself this past week even with not being back to 100%, to work out on the elliptical.
I need to keep going with this or else I might get lazy, and nobody wants lazy...LOL
I didn't do crazy amounts of time or push up my tension yet, I have been sorta weak from having the flu and didn't want to over do things.
Keep your fingers crossed for me that all goes well today.

Posted by Kat at 8:18 AM | Permalink | Comments (0)