Stress and the single dad.
On the local forums, this guy who has recently become a single dad, is selling off all of his son's baby furniture.
The baby crib, the changing table, the crib that transforms into a toddler bed, everything.
He's become, how should I say this, somewhat of a nuisance on the forums?
His son is 2 years old, and they are now alone together, his wife left.
Almost every day, he posts a new thread, asking for advice from the other single parents, on how to do this.
You know, how to do this whole single parent thing.
Many of us have told him, we just do it.
Before being stuck at home, I worked and worked. I had to. I didn't have a choice. I worked to pay all the bills because there was no one else.
This guy keeps asking the same questions, just worded differently every time.
How do I do this, how do I do that, where do I go for assistance etc.
We've told him every single time.
He's selling everything he owns to try and make ends meet, I've done that myself. He posts listings to his for sale items, begs people to buy them, then starts complaining that he can't do this single parent thing, it's too hard.
Yes, yes it is, but if he doesn't do it, who will?
Does he want to take the easy way out and give the kid to his wife? Would he rather DCF take the kid?
Every single piece of advice we have given him, he has made an excuse as to why he can't do it.
We're all starting to get a bit frustrated with him because well, we did it, what makes his situations so much different than any of ours?
He has a job, he just needs to find a suitable, affordable daycare, and maybe a second job to pay for it all.
We've even told him where to go and who to call to get help paying for daycare.
There are programs that offer subsides for single parents, and he's making excuses why he can't go there to get it.
His biggest excuse is they don't help single dads.
One of the other single dads, has told him that's not true, they help any parent, male or female, within certain income brackets.
But this guy then comes up with another excuse.
Frustrating doesn't even begin to describe how we're all feeling about this right now.
It's almost like he wants the help, but wants someone to just give it to him, not have to go anywhere or do anything to get it.
It sucks being a single parent, but if you don't do it, who will?
And speaking of single dads, why don't you check out my newest give-a-way?
Comments
This guy sounds like a whiny jerk. I bet he's actively looking for a wife so he can have her take care of his kids.
Mike once had a stepfather like that when he was a kid. Mike's bio father abandoned his family, hardly ever paid child support (sound familiar?). His mom went it alone, raising three kids, for a few years. Then she met and married this guy who had his own kids, the mother was no longer in the picture. As soon as they got married, he and his kids moved into Mike's mom's house, and he went on his merry little way, acting as if he were not only still single, but not a dad, as well. All he wanted her for was a free babysitter/maid, and maybe a little nookie now and then. But he was getting plenty of the latter on the side.
When she finally found out about his screwing around, she kicked his ass out of her house and filed for divorce. She never remarried after that, it was easier to go it alone than to be married to some asshole.
His kids were spoiled little brats, anyway, Mike said. Probably due to poor parenting on their father's part.
I just hope this guy won't turn out like that. You're right, he needs to step up to the plate and do his job as a parent.
Posted by: Christine | February 9, 2008 5:29 PM
I really hate people like that. You can tell them all the same stuff over and over again and it just never sticks for some reason.
Posted by: Jade | February 9, 2008 5:31 PM
they dont help single dads?
thats absolute bullshit.
i had tons of help when i needed it.
everything from daycare subsidies to WIC to a parenting coach who came to my house once a week. they dont care if you are a man or a woman. this guy doesnt want help. he wants excuses. he wants someone to tell him its ok to dump his kid off at some state home, because he doesnt really want to be a parent.
Posted by: brian | February 9, 2008 10:11 PM