My Single Mom Life

I took Sunday off from blogging to do absolutely nothing but rest my back and shoulder.
I had over done things in a big way all week even though I knew not to, and I paid dearly for it.
Then as I was sitting here at my desk yesterday reading through my blog feed reads, I came across ProBlogger's how to be more positive post.

And I felt guilty.
Just as I always do when I complain about the pain I'm in, here on my blog.
I don't like complaining, really I don't, but it's a daily part of my life and trying to be positive all the time, well, that just ain't happening.
The pain gets me down, I can't help it.
I know a lot of people think that those of us in chronic pain are lying about it, or it's all in our heads.
It's not, and as mean as it may be, sometimes, I wish those people who tell me that it's in my head, would get hurt and be in pain so that they finally know what this is like.
Constant chronic pain is depressing as well as painful.
There are days I don't even want to get out of bed, because between the pain and the bad feelings over it, I just want to curl up and die.
And just reading through the comments on that post, well, sorry, but it brought me even further down feeling than I was already, so I just didn't blog.
If you don't have anything nice to say, shut the hell up right?
And I'm sure I've lost readers over it, but that happens and not much I can do.
I wish my daily life wasn't like this, I wish I didn't get down about the pain and loss of "life", but I have, and try as I might to think like little Miss Pollyanna all the time, sometimes the thoughts just don't go away.
Plus, I believe in being honest with my readers.
If I have to lie and say every thing is just fucking awesome just to keep readers, then I am doing a major disservice to any of my readers.
Nobody likes a liar, even if it is to try and be more positive 'sounding'.

So anyway, I laid around and watched movies, napped, and just tried to feel better.
I watched Cloverfield a couple of times, and Alien Nation, and then packaged them back up to send back to Netflix this morning.

My neighbor and I just got back from Walgreen's and Publix, with both our scripts and food for our heathens.
I'm hoping that I snap outta this funk and soon, I don't like it when I'm like this very much either.