My Single Mom Life

Rachel from the BakedBlog, left me a comment, and seeing as how she's a new reader and commenter, I decided to go check out her blog.
I've now added it to my feed because she's funny, she cooks yummy looking foods, and she's got kids who do things when she turns her back for a second.
Don't all kids manage to make the biggest messes ever when your back is turned for just a second?
I swear, they have magic mess making abilities, or else their imaginary friends are helping them.
Maybe they could get a talent management company to come hire these kids to make messes for movies and other stuff.
It's a gift, a pure talent, to be able to do this kind of crap so quickly.

I posted this on her blog, she wants to know what kinds of messes other moms have had to clean up, but I thought I'd share it here too.
But you do have to go check her blog out, it rocks.

My story isn't so much a mess, but a waste of money, and humiliation.
I had gone shopping at Sam's club, buy everything in bulk to save money. I was still a single mom then too, so I needed to save as many pennies as I could.
I bought huge boxes of cereal, snacks, ginormous boxes of tampons and pantyliners, and like 50 rolls of toilet paper.
I was proud of my money saving skills man.

I had taken all the newly bought in bulk bathroom items upstairs along with my oldest son who is 16 now, but was just 3 then, and we set to "helping" mommy put away all the items of shampoo, soap, tampons, toilet paper, and pantyliners.

Then the phone rang, so I walked to my bedroom right across the hall to answer it.
It wasn't a cordless phone, but I was trying to keep my eye on him.
He put the huge package of toilet paper in the closet, the same with the box of tampons and soap. He placed the shampoo bottle on the side of the tub, so I turned my back for just 1 split second to hang up the phone.

When I walked back to the bathroom, I almost threw a tantrum myself.
I cried, I know I did.
That huge box of 500 pantyliners that only cost me $3, were now all IN the toilet and he had flushed it.
It had started to overflow and he backed up giggling like clogging the toilet with mommies vagina cloths was the most hysterical thing ever done.
Till he saw my face and the tears.
Then he started crying, said he was "sowwy mwommy, *sniffle sniffle*"

I grabbed as many pantyliners out of the toilet as I could get, threw them in the tub, tried to reach in the hole and pull out the clogged ones, all while crying as loud as my son was.

Then I grabbed a few towels to clean up the water on the floor, and plunged the toilet to try and dislodge the ones that had gone beyond my reach, but to no avail.
I had to shut off the water and call maintenance to come help me.

When I explained to the crew as they arrived and I showed them to the bathroom, they looked in the tub at some 400 water logged pantyliners, and explained how I tried to plunge the other 100 back out but may have made it worse, they started to snicker, then giggle, then it was all out laughter.
Both my son and I were still crying, but they were laughing at the idea of my kid trying to flush 500 pantyliners down the toilet.

It was humiliating, but they used a toilet snake, a super strong air compressor plunger, and the other 100 came out and they tossed them in the tub.
I apologized, red in the face, I mean, just what did those guys think?
This woman must bleed like a slaughtered pig during her period, just look at all these pantyliners, just look at the giant box of 500 tampax tampons in the closet.
I was dying of embarrassment, and they were laughing.

The next day, one crew guy came back over and said he had something just perfect for me.
He led me upstairs to the bathroom, and installed a toilet lid lock that could only be opened by an adult squeezing on two buttons at the same time.
He said just in case my son ever felt like flushing his blankie down, this was definitely going to stop him.
I thanked him, he was still laughing, and I finally just blurted out;
"I don't have heavy periods! I wanted to save money buying in bulk! The tampax and pantyliners would have lasted me a whole year! I was just trying to save money! I swear I don't bleed like a chicken with my head cut off!"

That's when he busted out in the loudest laugh ever, and I was even more embarrassed than I was the day before.