My Single Mom Life

All 3 of us now have some sort of pain, we're all laughing about it because it is kind of funny, all of us in some sort of pain.
Sebastian pulled a muscle on the side of his stomach, like his obliques, and Mark is still having horrible back pain, and the teens now understand what I've been going through with my back and spine fusion pain.
Mark especially, his back is hurting him so much that he can barely sleep anymore, and this is a teen who usually can sleep for a good 18 hours if I would let him.

I'll be taking Mark to the orthopedist on Thursday after I find a ride there,
The last time we went down to the docs at that address, we took a cab, it cost $20 each way for a 10 minute ride, yeah.
I'd rather give a friend $10-$20 for gas than to pay $40 to take a cab again.
I'm going to call a friend today and see if he can help me out.
But anyway, Mark is starting to get nervous about it and I've tried like crazy to calm his fears, but he knows what I've had to go through, he's been with me every step of the way, the surgeries, the physical therapy, the braces and walkers, canes, shower chairs, and agonizing pain for days on end, so he's really getting a bit scared.
He did joke about it a bit last night though, both he and I have been up all night, neither of us can sleep, both of us are in pain, but he made a funny.
He said that buying Ferrari parts or Maserati parts, would be a whole lot cheaper than having spine fusion.
I laughed out loud and said that they probably would be, spine fusion surgeries are wicked expensive, I'll be paying off those bills till the day I die.
He laughed and said "Oh, that's great! I'm only 18 and I'll be paying off my surgeries till the day that I die too if they say that we need to do surgery!"
I told him not to think about surgery yet, we haven't even had xrays yet, just a physical examination and rib hump check, it could be something super easy to fix like a herniated disc, so chill out man, don't get freaked out about it yet.
He said that he would try to relax, but it's getting closer to the appointment date, so it's on his mind more now.

I'm really hoping that it's super easy to fix, no surgery needed, I don't want to see him go through even a small fraction of what I've been through.
I am trying so hard to keep positive thoughts, to try and make him keep positive thoughts, but he knows all too well what a diagnosis of scoliosis can mean, and he's afraid.
I hate that.
I hate that I could have given this problem to him, I hate it, I will feel so guilty if I did, if the doc on Thursday says that it is scoli.
I think I'm probably more afraid of the diagnosis than he is.