My Single Mom Life

Ever since like last Thursday, not yesterday, but like Thursday the 20th, I've been sick and battling health issues again.
I'm not going into it all over again, you can read about it at KatScan if you want to, but I'm sorta starting to finally mend from that, but now tonight it's raining and so my back is killing me and my ankles are swelling up from blood clots again.
When they said, 'when it rains, it pours', they really must have meant that saying for me, because it's just been 1 thing after another since last week.
I'm like beyond fed up with my body at this point.

So anyway, I've been home all week now, mostly laying on the couch watching tv and movies, resting as much as I could stand to do like all of my doctors have all told me to do, and then my tv started acting all funky.
First, while watching a movie on Tuesday evening, Empire Records, the colors started fading in and out, black and white, then all funky and stripey during the brownie Gwar scene, so I checked a few other channels and they seemed to be ok, so I just chalked it up to being either the movie being old, or an error with the movie channel.
Then later that same day on another channel, it happened again.
And it kept happening until my tv set was showing absolutely nothing at all but black and white on every single channel.
*sigh*
I do have another tv set, it's the one that I was using before my sister had brought over this one that is now faded, and so I knew that I was going to need to go get it from my bedroom, haul it out here, and make the switch, but I physically just couldn't do it, so I just decided to deal with the black and white until I could do it later on when I felt like I could do it.

Here it is now Friday evening, and I still hadn't done it, I had just gotten to the point of I don't really care anymore because it has just been 1 of those weeks in my life where when I dared the made-up gods to just go ahead and send me just 1 more damn thing that they felt like throwing at me, and *poof*, my big 26inch tv went *poof*. ha ha

I decided to go and take a long, hot shower, hoping that it would at least calm me down, soothe me if it did absolutely nothing else at all, and so I went in there to stand in the hottest water that I could possibly stand, even allowing the tub to fill up over my ankles because they've started to swell up now too this evening, and I just stayed in there for oh, maybe 20 minutes or so.
I stayed in there until no matter how hot I turned the water, it was no longer getting hotter, but colder.
When I came out, I went to other other room, threw on some comfy clothes, and came back to sit in my chair.
That's when I looked up and noticed that my now all black and white 26inch tv was gone, and now in it's place, was Mark's Vizio 26inch widescreen LCD HDTV that he got for graduating last year.
I asked the teens, who were sitting here smiling, why they did that, it was their tv for playing their video games on, I have another tv in the other room.
They said they knew, and they went and got that one and hooked it up in their room to play video games on.
I asked them again why they did that, why didn't they just put my old tv out here and keep theirs, and Mark said that it was his tv to do with what he wanted, and he felt wicked bad for me because of the really super crappy week that I had, because all of my docs yelled at me and told me that I need to stay laying down as much as possible, and because I never sleep, because all I can do when I have insomnia and I'm being forced to lay down and behave myself, is to lay on the couch and watch tv and movies, so he decided that he wanted me to be able to watch tv and movies on a wicked nice tv for a change, that I deserved to have at least 1 nice thing this week, so he and Sebastian swapped out the tvs while I was in the shower.
I do have to admit, it is a really super nice tv to watch movies on.
My old tv worked really good for like the last 10 years, great picture and color quality, I never complained once about a movie looking bad on it, but yeah, this is a really super nice tv.

Mark told me that he'd rather I just keep it out here from now on too, as this is the room where we all watch movies together, and the other tv set is actually much better for playing video games on, he says.
I don't buy that at all.
Not for a single second.
I've seen him play Gears of War 2 and Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2, on the Vizio, and there's a big, massive, HUGE difference when playing video games on an old standard television set, and on one of the new LCD HDTV flat panel sets.
BIG DIFFERENCE.
I tried talking to him about it, tried talking him into swapping it back, it's his tv that he got as a present for graduating high school last May, it was given to him specifically so that when he played his video games, that they would look so super cool on it, and he said that he knows and agrees, games do look really super cool on it, but he said that he wanted me to have a really wicked nice tv to watch movies on for the next week or however long the doctors tell me to stay laying down and resting because I had such a really bad, totally sucky week.
He said I deserved to see all of the super gory details of a fave horror movie if one comes on that I liked, in the most awesome picture quality, that I should at least be able to enjoy myself a little bit while my docs force me to rest 24-7 even though they still haven't got a single clue as to why I should be being forced to rest.
He said that even though his back totally sucks too, he's going to see if the owner of the corner store up the street needs to hire anyone, and he'll get a job to try and help out financially around here, and if the owner says yes, he'll work his butt off for the guy.
He said that he's old enough to work any of the shifts alone too, because you only have to be 18 to legally ring up cig and alcohol sales.
He really wants to start pitching in financially around here, to help make it easier on me because he knows how difficult it is for me sometimes to do the work that I have to do, and because he sees just how hard I work to not just make sure that the bills are paid, but so that I can pay for all of the things that make them happy.
He said that he really wants to get a job, start helping to pay the bills, and then return all of the love and generosity that I give to them when I pay for their video games, game subscriptions, and all of the little tiny stuff like bottles of soda and bags of hot fries whenever I go to the corner store, and so he wants to be able to buy me my own LCD HD flat panel tv on sale some one of the days he earns enough pay.

You know, sometimes, teenagers can be real jerks, they can say things that really hurt your heart, they can shoot you the most painful looks, and they can say 90 million times that they will clean the cat's litter boxes and not do it, and then watch you do it like you should have been doing it yourself all along.
They can do and say a lot of things that make you wish they would age from toddler to adult in less than a year because the teen years are the hardest years that you'll ever face when you decide to have a kid, but then sometimes, they do something as simple as swapping out your old crappy box tv set for their nice one that they rightfully don't have to share with you at all, and it can be the nicest thing that's been done for you all month long.
And then they can just say that they want to get a job and pitch in on paying the bills, and that they want to help pay for all of the hundreds of dollars worth of food that they inhale every week, and that they want to buy you your own really nice tv set, and even if it doesn't ever happen, even if they do get a job but never buy that tv set, it's the fact that they said they wanted to do it, and because they said that you deserve it, that makes you feel like you got the best damn kids in the world.

Yeah, I know, this is all stupid and mushy sounding, and it's like wicked way long, but really, just swapping out the tv sets to surprise me while I was taking a shower, really made me happy after the week that I've had.
It's just like, wicked nice to know that they've been paying attention, they saw how hurt and upset I am, and they were at least trying to understand how this week has made me feel and they wanted to do something nice for me to try and make me feel better, and it did, it has.
It's been a very lonely and scary week, and they did one of the nicest and coolest things for me.