"Dear Secret Santa,

I wanted to say thank you, whoever you are, for helping me and my sons this Christmas by paying our January rent.
Even though it's only December 16th, I was already stressed out and worried about paying January's rent.
With the small amount of disability that I receive every month, and the small amounts of money that I earn online doing freelance article writing, I'm always stressed out and worried about paying my rent and bills every single month.
I pay the current month's rent, and the very next day, I immediately start stressing about the next month's rent and bills.
So thank you, thank you so, so very much for taking a huge weight off of my shoulders.
You have absolutely no idea how much your generosity really means to me, but I want you to know that it means a very great deal to me. It means that for the month of January, I don't have to skip paying the electric or phone bill so that I can pay the rent in full, it means that all of my bills will get paid in full for the month of January, and that is a huge deal to me.
Dearest Secret Santa, thank you so very much for helping me and my sons this Christmas by paying our January rent. Now we can truly have a nice Christmas without me being stressed out and worried over paying the next month's rent and bills.

I hope that YOU and your family have an absolutely wonderful and joyous Christmas, because you've given me and my sons an absolutely wonderful and joyous Christmas by taking the worry and stress out of it.
Have a Very, Merry Christmas!

Kat, Mark, and Sebastian Cooper"

Is that too cheesy and cornball-ish?
Too sappy?
I'm not really sure what to say to this man whoever he may be, other than to fill the inside and outside of the card, and the entire outside of the envelope, with a million "thank yous"....LoL

What would you say to someone who wants to be anonymous, but has just given you the best Christmas present you've ever gotten in your whole life?

So right now, I'm cooking the 24lb turkey that I didn't cook yesterday.
It was totally thawed out yesterday, so I needed to cook it so it doesn't go to waste. I'm not gonna cook all the fixings to go with it tonight, but the turkey was a must cook. I refuse to let that much food go to waste.
I got a good price on that turkey too, it's a 24lb turkey for just $12.50 at Publix, awesome price!
So yeah, I wasn't about to let that go to waste, no way!

I hope that all of you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving with your family and loved ones, or whoever you spent it with.

I will also finish the laundry and vac the rugs.
I sprinkled the carpet powder down last night so I have to vac it up, but the dishes, they are an absolute must do, and they will be done even if it kills me.
Well, not really kill me, but even if doing them causes me to be in pain for the next 3 days, I AM GOING TO GET THE DISHES DONE.
ALL OF THEM.

So, yeah, it's been that kind of time for me lately.
Yup, me and my lists, sitting down making my lists, and making my budget with absolutely NO BUDGET to speak of, but I was trying like heck to do it anyway.
I got myself into one heck of a financial jam thanks to all of the ongoing medical stuff that I've been dealing with.
I mean, how the hell am I supposed to pay for everything when I've got 90 million doctor appointments, xrays, CT scans, lab work, etc etc, and all of them have co-pays ranging in price from $25 - $250??
I've been doing the absolute best that I could do paying for all of it, rent, utility bills, and all of those medical tests and appointments, and so I ended up robbing Peter to pay Paul, and then Paul to pay Peter, and ended up getting myself into a situation that I could not find a way out of no matter how hard I tried.

My landlord has been a really awesome landlord over these last 14+ years that I've now lived in this duplex.
I've been late on the rent and he's not been "OK" with it, but he's allowed me to pay him when I could, and he's only raised the rent on me 3 times (now) in all of these years too.
He had to raise the rent on me starting on October 1st, and I was already behind in my rent, I was paying him, just not in full every month for the last 6-7 months while I've been going through this medical nightmare, so getting hit with a rent increase really sucked.
I did everything that I could do to come up with the amount of money that he said that he needed to have by Saturday October 15th.
I mean it, I did everything that I could do without having to resort to some sort of crime.
I had an indoor yard sale, I allowed friends to come over and tell me what they were interested in, and if it wasn't something that we wanted or it had no sentimental value to any of us, they made an offer, and I took it.
I managed to sell a couple hundred dollars worth of stuff in just about a week, but it still wasn't enough money to meet the amount that I needed.

I did end up getting the money that I needed, and I'm like, eternally grateful that I did, but wow man, from September 26th until October 15th, my heart was in my throat every single day, I didn't sleep, I didn't eat, all I did was stress, worry, and panic, call people and places for help, and throw up.
Next time that I'm in that kind of bind, and I really hope that I'm NEVER in THAT kind of bind again, but if I ever am, I'm going to check out CreditRelease.com and see if I can get one of those bad credit loans that they talk about on their website, I found their website after seeing a commercial.
I don't even remember what channel or anything, it was so late at night, and I was just clicking just to click, to take my mind off of everything for even just a few minutes of not freaking out.
I've called other places like that before, and they wouldn't help me, but this place sounds like they'd help someone like me, someone with a really bad credit score. (THANKS SO MUCH EX-MOM-IN-LAW!!!!)
Yeah, my credit score is still totally screwed up because of her, I'm still discovering things on my credit report that she did.
It's like I get 1 or 2 things knocked off, and then 3 or 4 more things show up.

I know that the interest rates would probably be very high, but I CAN'T go through the absolute hell and agony that I just went through, again.
I can't. I just can't go through that again. It'll kill me.
On their site, it says the following:

Our client charter states that you'll receive a loan no matter your credit history. It doesn't matter what financing you're after or how poor your credit score is, our nationwide service will guarantee that you will have access to means of financing. Individuals with high-risk profiles, with poor or no credit are welcomed.

I don't have very many friends in my life anymore because of my inability to go out and do things, and because of my lack of trust in people, and gossip that people do.
I dislike gossip so much, and I try to avoid it at all costs because it does nothing but cause problems.
Person A tells person B something about person C, and before you can blink, peoples D through G have all now heard and retold some form of the original story about person C, and it has also made it's way back to person C, who is now not only extremely confused about the things that are supposedly going on in their own life, but also hurt beyond any kind of words for betrayal, pain, confusion, and loss that can be thought of, because person A was supposed to be their very best friend in their whole world.

Right now, these things are tied together for me, the list making, budgeting, and the gossip that people do.

If a friend helps me out with something, I write it down, I keep track of it so that if in the event that friend ends up needing some help at some point, I have a physical reminder that they've helped me, and because I've written it down, it encourages me to find some way to help them with whatever it is that they need.
It's not really keeping score, but more like keeping track of the good that is done for me so that I always know who to be grateful to.

But lately, I feel like like I AM keeping score.
I feel like I'm doing more helping and more giving of myself, my time, my money, my whatever, and when I've needed help, I'm not getting it back, and I'm really starting to resent it.
I'm starting to resent it because of the gossip that people do.

Various people have been telling me that this friend that I've been helping, has been lying to me in order to both get help from me, and also to avoid helping me in return when I need it and have asked them for help.
I hate gossip, I don't want to believe this gossip, but my feelings, my instincts, my gut, is wrenched and is telling me that it's the truth.
The very words and actions of my friend make my stomach twist as soon as I hear her speak the words to me, and see her body movements.
I know that even though it's gossip, that it IS the truth.
I know that when she has recently been asking me for help, she hasn't really needed it, but by my helping her, it was extra help for her so she didn't have to stress and worry as much.
I know that when I recently asked her for help, she lied to me when she said that she couldn't, that she had no way of helping me, and that she was struggling horribly too.
I know that these things are lies not only because of the gossip that people do, but because of her own words and actions, as I've said.
And it hurts.
It hurts beyond any kind of words for betrayal, pain, confusion, and loss that can be thought of, because I consider her to be my best friend.

All of my list making and budgeting, all of the things that I've done to help her and written down, and any of the things that she's done here and there and I've written down so that it would encourage me to be grateful to her and always help her in return if I was able to help her in return, now feels like a score sheet, like I've been keeping score for the winners and the losers, and I'm on the losing team.

I feel totally betrayed right now, I trusted in her, trusted in our friendship, believed in her, and believed her whenever she swore to keep a confidence over something that I felt I needed to talk about and she'd swear to keep it, even hug me and tell me that things were going to be OK.
I hate the gossip so so very much, but I KNOW that what is being gossiped about, are things that I ONLY shared with her.
I shared these things with no one else because I don't have anyone else that I feel felt that I could trust. I don't have anyone else that I love like family, really and truly care about, and so I feel crushed and stomped on, and stomped down.

I've spent the last few days to a week thinking about all of this, going over the gossip stories that I've heard, remembering when I told things to her, if anyone else at all was around, trying to recall if I could have possibly said it to anyone else at all, and no, I couldn't have, didn't, I wouldn't have, because she is the ONLY one that I really felt that I could really trust.

I don't know what to do, do I talk to her about it all?
Confront her?
Try to sit down and ask her if all of the gossip going around is the truth?
Or do I say screw it, and just let her go out of my life like I've had to do with other people who've betrayed me like this, or people who just caused so much drama every single day that it stressed me out too much?
I WANT to believe that she didn't betray me, that she didn't betray my confidence in her, that she didn't betray our friendship, but I know the truth, I know that she did.
I know this because she really is the only person that I told anything at all to, because she is, she was, I thought, my best friend.

I don't want to go back to having to stay alone, not have a friend in my life because of the gossip and lack of trust, but I'm so tired of all of the he said/she said crap that people do.
When my FRIEND tells me something, I DO NOT TELL IT TO ANYONE ELSE.
EVER.
She's told me so many things during our many, many hours of long talks, but I have not once ever shared them with anyone else because she's my friend, and when it's just us, just the two of us friends hanging out and talking, even if neither one of us says "Swear that this stays between us", every word she's ever said to me, has stayed with me.
She's the only person that I ever really and truly talk to, I don't ever talk and open up to anyone else, I don't have long "girl talks" with anyone else, and so yeah, it's hurting me very bad right now that our long talks that have just been the two of us, have been retold to others, and that I've been lied to.
I've been lied to and used, and things that I've said to my best friend, the one person that I trusted, have been told to other people, just spread around, gossiped about.

All of my lists that I use to help keep me grateful and encourage me to help when I can, are just score sheets now, and I'm the loser.

They stopped and pretended to ask for directions, the passenger then grabbed me by my hair with one hand, then my purse with the other and threw it to the drover who started to accelerate a little, the driver took all the money from my wallet, $37.00, then stole all my pill bottles full of my heavy duty, controlled substance narcotics, then she threw my purse out of the truck window, and then the passenger let me go.
This all happened in mere seconds and while the truck was moving, not at a fast speed, but just fast enough that I had to jog along side because the bitch had me by the hair.
Once the driver threw my purse out, the passenger let go of me, and I rolled about 5-7 feet.
I was in such a state of shock and adrenaline pumping, that I didn't realize that I was injured, so I picked up my purse and purse contents that were thrown about the ditch, and then my sandals which had fallen off while I was running, and then I walked back home.
I walked in the house and the teens saw me, TOTALLY freaked out and ran outside to look for them and then also ask the neighbor for the video tapes while I called the cops and an ambulance, and now I'm just getting home from the ER.

NOTHING is broken, AMAZINGLY, but I am covered with road rash and by morning, my entire body will be covered in bruises, literally from head to toe.

The good news.
The guy at the end of the street caught it all on camera as he video tapes the 4-way intersection for stop sign runners 24 hours a day, and in their haste to get away, they blew through the stop sign.
The police and sheriffs already have the tapes, and by tomorrow afternoon, if not already, the assailants will be in custody because not only did they do this to me, but they ran the stop sign and were caught on video as I said.
It's a Toyota Sequoia in Silver, just like this one pictured here, a little mini-SUV type car.

So I really, REALLY, want to thank Glen at Fail 2 Stop, for having all those cameras to catch the criminals.
I haven't been told yet, but I've watched some of the videos, and in some of them you can just barely see the side street, Restful Lane, where they finally let me go after robbing and dragging me from my mailbox to that corner.
I'm not good with distances, or north-south type stuff, but the detective who came to see me and ask me some questions, said it was about 100-115 feet from my mailbox where it started to that corner where they let go of my hair.

When the police asked him, Glen, for the tapes and explained why they needed them, he was more than happy to hand them over, the detective said.
He's not only been fighting the speeders and stop sign runners, but all of the criminals, the drug dealers, and prostitutes which have slowly been taking over our neighborhood over the last 2-3 years.

I was in the ER from about 7:30pm until about 20-30 minutes ago. (More like 2.5 hours now at the time of this writing thanks to dozing off and on thanks to the really strong meds in me)
They did a CT scan of my neck, and xrays of my whole body, and like I said, LUCKILY, absolutely nothing is broken or fractured.
Nothing, I'm amazed because my body took a helluva beating during the ordeal.
But I have some serious road rash on my left shoulder and blade, road rash on my elbows and knees, and my lower back and BOTH hips took a major beating while I was rolling for those 5-7feet.

The docs pumped me full of meds, so please excuse any typos. (THANK GOODNESS FOR AUTO-SPELL CHECK FF!!!)
In the morning, I have to go to the police station and pick up a copy of the report, then swing by the ER xrays department and get copies my films, and then take it all next door to give my doc.
Hopefully, seeing as I just went to him today (Monday) and got all my meds filled for the month, that he will write me new scripts to get me through the month without too much pain and discomfort.
I don't want or even expect him to write for all the same meds, he'd get in trouble with the DEA, but I obviously need meds to make it through the month, even more so now that this happened.

Right at the moment, I'm feeling OK, but again, that's because they pumped me full of Toradol, Dilaudid, and Soma
through an IV, and then they made me walk the halls a bit to check and see if I was able to go home.
It hurt like hell to walk, ut I did it and wanted to come home so bad.

I'm OK, I want to make that very clear, nothing at all is broken or fractured, but I will be heavily bruised by morning all over my whole body from rolling approximately 5-7 feet after she let go of my hair.
The bitch got a chunk of hair in her hand, and my forehead also has a nice sized (/sarcasm>) bump on it, my lower back and hips took a massive beating man, and so when the paramedics strapped me to the board along with a neck brace that was extremely uncomfortable due to my head/neck being the way that it is for exactly 3 years to the day now, I was in pure fucking agony the whole way to the hospital and for about the 1st hour while they ran tests.
They left me strapped to the board and in the brace that long so that I couldn't move at all just in case something was broken.
They apologized over and over, they knew the board and brace were hurting me, but it was for my protection just in case something really was broken.
I really do appreciate it, they (BEST damn hospital in the state IMHO) were only doing what was right for me, protecting me from a possible major injury, but wow man, that board and brace hurt.
My head does not look straight ahead, only down, and while they tried to make the brace hold my head and neck as it is and has been, the brace forced it up as straight as it could, and that was some fucking pain I tell ya.
After they got me off the board, it was sooooo much better, more comfy, but I was in hell with pain.
Then they started pumping me full of meds every 30 minutes, so yeah, I'm a bit on the wasted side at the moment.
Those meds are not strong on their own, but combined together and in the heavy doses they gave me, it's really potent and I feel like I dank a gallon of the world's best vodka for an entire weekend.

To take home and until my doc can get me in with the police report and xray films, they gave me scripts for the same meds, Toradol, Dilaudid , and Soma, but told me to get my police report and films, and call my doctor asap, so I will be doing that very first thing in the morning.

The police believe that I may have been targeted, like someone was watching me, keeping track of my schedule and knew that today was pain doc day, and then they struck when they saw me walking home alone from my friend Nikki's house right up the street.
Thanks to the videotape, they will be able to get the plate number and go after whoever was driving the vehicle, and hopefully, also find the bitch passenger who had me by the hair.
She had a death grip on my ponytail man, I thought she was gonna take it (ponytail) right off the way she had it so tight, and if the driver had sped up.

In a side note, my landlord was at the community meeting for the 4 way stop signs and criminal activities in our neighborhood, when the call came in, he knew the address, OBVIOUSLY, and so he came by the house and then called back again to ask if the teens had heard from me.
Sebastian stayed home, but Mark came to the hospital with my friend Nikki who was a complete mess, poor thing was bawling her eyes out every time she looked at me, and then when she had to leave to go home to put her daughter to bed, but when I was finished at the ER, she told me to call her and she'd come pick Mark and I up, and she did.
As soon as I got in the truck and slid over to the middle, she threw her arms around me, told me she loved me.
She is truly my very, very best friend down here in Florida. Shell will always be my best for the rest of my life, secrets o the grave, but Nikki is just like her, I trust her with my secrets, and my life.

Sorry, I git sidetracked, then, because it is his (landlord) property where the incident happened, he asked to be assigned to the case along with the lead detectives on it, and he called Sebastian twice while I was at the ER, that he would do everything he could to find the 2 rotten skanks who did this to me.
I know that I've said it more than a few times, but my landlord is a truly awesome human being.
He's seen and helped me through some of the hardest and leanest years of my life over the last 14 years that I've now lived in this duplex.
He didn't evict me me as I waited for my SSDI to be approved and could only pay him a few hundred dollars per month, at the most sometimes, but he's also an extremely caring and kind man and human being as he showed tonight, but many times in the past years.
During all of my surgeries, he sent a 'Get Well' card once a week every single week for several months, he helped out after my surgeries by mowing the lawn, taking our trash to the curb, and there have been times, he's just called to check on me, just to ask how I was doing, and he just really cares about us, about me and my sons who he has watched grow up over the last 14 years of living in this duplex.

But to answer the obvious and burning question I'm sure many people have right now.....
NO, I DO NOT KNOW WHO THEY ARE, I've never seen them before, but like I said, the police believe that they my have targeted me, maybe they have seen me at Walgreens getting my meds filled every single month at the exact same Walgreen's, and thanks to the question they have to ask before they ring you up, "CAN YOU PLEASE VERIFY YOUR ADDRESS AND PHONE NUMBER?"
The cops believe they may have over-heard that, and decided to strike, or they may have been "casing" me for some time.
Maybe they've seen me at my doctor's office or at Walgreen's, and have just been watching me for a few months, and decided that today was the day.
I got done at my doc's around 10:28am, went straight across the street to Walgreen's. and then made a stop at the store, and then had my ride drop me off at Nikki's house around 1-2pm until I decided to walk home around 6:30pm.

I feel like a complete and total idiot.
I KNOW not to talk to strangers, I KNOW not to walk up to a stranger's vehicle, but they were 2 young girls, mid to early 20's, looked totally harmless, (looks are so so sooooo deceiving) and there ya go, lesson learned.

The really fucking hard way.

In my head, I can still see my baby boys in their 1st day of kindergarten outfits, with their little Batman for Mark and Power Rangers for Sebastian backpacks on, with their matching lunchboxes, their brand new sneakers, and 1st day of school haircuts, and the name-tag stickers shaped like apples that were given to us at kindergarten orientation just a few days before, stuck on the front of their brand new shirts, and their big huge smiles.
I recall every single minute of those 1st days of school.
Not just for kindergarten, but for every single year that they went to school, and all the changes in them with each new school year that started.
Different haircuts, different heights and weights, different backpacks and sneakers, different sounding voices, and the very different, very individual young men that they have grown up to be.

The thrill of never having to go do back to school shopping wore off rather quickly when I realized, when it hit me like a ton of bricks to the back of my head, that my baby boys are not baby boys anymore.

If you played the original game and liked it, you can buy the new one, Alice: The Madness Returns, at Buy.com on sale, and get free shipping too.

Here's the official launch trailer, and a demo of some of the game-play, it looks absolutely amazing and I can't wait to get it tonight and start playing!

The new game also comes with the old pc game, but it's now playable on the console, and so I'm excited about being able to play the old game too, it was always so much fun.
The graphics back then weren't great, but now for the xbox, they look amazing.

I'm so excited for this game!
I pre-purchased it, and we are going to the launch party tonight, myself and the teens, and a friend of mine is driving us there and then we're all gonna come back home and play the game until our hands cramp up. Hahaha!
I have no idea what's going to happen at the launch party, but I'm excited, and I'm going to take my camera and snap some pics of the party and stuff, it should be a fun time.
Later days!

Been up all night, wicked stressed out and having mini panic attacks because of my bitch of a neighbor, so I've been watching tons of movies and just trying, very poorly I might add, to calm down and take my mind off of everything that has happened since last Saturday with my neighbor.
All I can do is hope that karma comes for her.
I'm sure it will, it comes for everyone, eventually.
I've already seen it come round for for one person who seemed to thrive on trying to make me as miserable as possible.
I never used to believe that karma was real, but when I saw it come for that person in the exact manner that they chose to attack me, well that is when I knew that karma is very real.
What you put out there, how we ALL treat each other, good or bad, it comes back to us and it comes back 10 fold.
So I try everyday, I try to treat other people the very best that I can.
I'm trying very hard to treat people the way I want to be treated, and especially the people who treat me wrong.
I'm trying even harder to treat THOSE PEOPLE better.
No matter what they say to me or about me, I'm trying to treat them with extreme kindness, courtesy, and politeness.
My neighbor, however, is the ONLY person that I'm struggling with.
What she's done Is unforgivable.
She almost totally ruined Sebastian's birthday, she almost ripped my sons and I apart, and she caused major strife within my family with old issues, but certain family members get to say the oh so fun "I told you so".
This entire past week has been non-stop strife with my neighbor.
It's been daily, multiple times per day, harassment from her with absolutely horrible things said about me and my sons.
Mess with me all you want, but DON'T EVER mess with my sons.
I also try not to hate or even say that I hate someone, but my neighbor has just really pushed me to the very edge of my limits since Saturday May 28th.
I admit to totally losing it more than twice, and saying out loud and very loudly, I actually yelled and screamed, that I hate her, and many other truly horrible words.
I've even gone so far as to wish and say loudly that she should just drop dead right now.
One of her many medical issues will eventually (probably very soon) kill her.
The woman is morbidly obese, has diabetes, congestive heart disease, and some sort of breathing problem, (not emphysema) and she's a two pack-a-day smoker on oxygen with big warning signs on her front door to not smoke, yet she sits inside and puffs away on Pall Mall full flavor kings, and all of these things are going to kill her, probably very soon, but what she did, the things that she said, caused so much anger, hurt, and other issues/problems, that I became so furiously enraged, that I wished for her death immediately.
I don't like feeling this much anger and yes, hatred, for someone.
I don't feel good, I don't feel right inside, and it's really bothering me.
I don't like feeling hatred grow and boil-up inside of me, it just isn't a good feeling at all, and it's causing me even more stress.
I've lost my voice, I feel nauseous, and keep getting headaches, the anger and hatred is physically manifesting, it's so strong that it's making me physically sick.
By talking about my feelings, I'm hoping it will help to relieve some of these physical signs of the stress caused and brought on by the things that this woman has said and done, and continues to do.

I've now blocked all form of communication with her, she can no longer call the house phone, and I've blocked her from calling and texting my cell phone, so it's been really quiet today, thankfully.
But before I was able to block her yesterday, she sent me over 20 texts in just under 10 minutes, and all of them said horribly nasty things, and even more lies.
I saved all of these text messages to show the people that we are mutual friends with when they ask me what is going on, because she is calling and texting them with this incredibly long story full of lies, so when they (friends) say certain things, I can show them the texts from her that state the truth, not the lies she is currently telling everyone in an attempt to make herself look like she didn't do anything at all wrong.
One of my friends was absolutely floored when she saw the truth, she couldn't believe what she was reading, but there it was, along with all kinds of other nasty stuff she texted me.

I am trying so very hard to let it go, to breathe, I know that this will all pass, but it's literally been a nightmare since May 28th, so it's very difficult to let go, but I'm trying, and slowly, the anger and hatred inside of me is fading, and I hope that when it does, I get my voice back.
I've totally lost my voice, I try to speak, and nothing is coming out, so I'm trying to not talk, drinking plenty of fluids, and resting as much as I can.

But some cool stuff has happened, Sebastian got some of his broken arm settlement money and has bought his new laptop for college, and he bought Mark and I each a gift.
He bought Mark some new video games he wanted, and he bought me a Nook Color when we were up at Best Buy and Barnes and Noble on Friday.
The Nook is so freaking cool! It can do pretty much everything that the ipad can do, plus it reads books.
I'm actually using it to write this post from the couch right now!
It does so so much more than read books, it's really very freaking cool.
It's definitely coming in very useful seeing as I'm spending so much time laying down.

That's all for now I guess, later days.

Sebastian has graduated from high school early!!!
Yay!!!
He decided to take the exit option which means if the student works super hard, gets all of their credits in less time, and passes all of the final exams and a graduation test, they can get their diploma and be done with school.
So he studied hard and worked hard, and on Thursday, he handed in all of his books and picked up his diploma.
He's also decided to not march in the graduation ceremony, and honestly, I don't mind.
We went to Mark's, the arena where they hold it has really poor AC, there's almost 1,000 graduating seniors and about 5,000 - 6,000 people there to watch, so it's even hotter, and the ceremony takes about 3.5 hours.
So yeah, I really do not mind that he doesn't want to march, no problem at all!

In Mark news, he and his friend Geoff have been doing all kinds of things together lately.
They helped pain houses for Habitat for Humanity, and have been doing all kinds of other things as well.
Geoff's grandmother wants the both of them to get jobs and work together at the same place because she thinks that it will help them stay motivated if they can stay together.
Together, they do a ton of stuff, they have energy and can paint houses and all kinds of things, but when not together, they both tend to sleep till 2pm and play video games.
She's already picked up applications for the both of them for a couple of places, some window manufacturing place, a couple of restaurants, Home Depot, and who knows what else, I wouldn't even be surprised if she tried to send them to personal trainer school just to get them jobs so they can stay together.
She has a really big heart and just loves to help and wants to see them both succeed, so she's trying everything she can to try and get them jobs together.

I'm still waiting on my tax refund to come, and this year there will be no vacation.
I'm getting way less back than previous years, and because Mark doesn't have any health insurance any more, the only way to get him in to see a doctor is if I pay cash out of pocket.
It's worth it to me if I can find a doctor to help him, because if he gets help, then he will be able to get a job and work without too much pain.
Some things that I definitely need to get when I do finally get my taxes back, a new computer chair for the teens because their chair is literally falling apart, and Sebastian does so much artwork and stuff on their computer, it's what he wants to go to school for, so I need to get them a new chair.
I need to get Mark into see a doctor, and I need to order a year's supply of contact lenses because these are so old and dirty that I can't see anymore, and there was something else but for the life of me I can't think of it right now.

I guess that's all for now.
Later days.

I start to turn and try to walk away, but she's now got a tight grip on my left arm, I tell her that she needs to let go of me, the rain is now coming down harder, I'm getting wet, I've got kids to get home to, please let go.
She tells me that she's got the gift and "You need to trust me and relax, loosen up, who cares about the rain when I can heal you, I can fix you!" she yells at me, "Relax! Let me do what I have a natural god-given talent to do, I can heal you, I can fix your head and neck! Relax! Loosen up and just trust me!"
She has my left arm in a tight grip and her right hand is rubbing up and down my arms, neck, shoulders, and lower back, upper back, and again, moves her hand to my breasts.
I pull away hard and tell her that I AM going now, stop touching me and leave me alone.
I turn and practically run home.
I got in the door and told the boys that I was just molested by a woman named Wanda who said she can heal my head and neck, she had me in a tight grip and wouldn't let go of me, I had to pull away and walk as fast as I could to get home.
The boys are all what???
I tell them everything that happened and they tell me that I am not allowed to go walking anywhere by myself again, that Wanda could be a total lunatic (COULD BE?!?!?) and she might hurt me.
I agree that she's totally nuts and a total pervert too.

A few days goes by, I don't see her anywhere when either of the teens are with me, so one day about a full week or so later, I decide to go my friend N.'s house by myself again.
When I leave a few hours later, there's Wanda, standing at the fence that surrounds the apartments where N. lives.
She's standing there waiting for me.
I immediately grab my cell and call the teens, I tell them that one or both of them need to hurry their asses up and get up the street immediately, Wanda is here, she's following me right now, she's yelling at me to stop, she has to talk to me, she can heal me, god is telling her to heal me, it's a mission from god that she has to do, I MUST stop because god has told her that she has to heal me!
Both of the teens run up the street, Mark has the knife and they are hauling ass to get to me and when they catch up to me, Wanda is still right behind me, still yelling at me to stop.
Sebastian grabs me by the hand and starts to practically pull me home and Mark tells Wanda that if she comes near me again, that he will have her arrested for harassment and assault because of how she physically grabbed me and wouldn't let go of me that first time.
Wanda tells Mark that the cops will not arrest her when they hear that god has told her to heal me, they will set her free and they will MAKE ME let her heal me because when god commands people to do something, the police HAVE to abide by the word and laws of god, and they will hold me while she heals me.
Mark tells her that she's totally fucking cracked nuts and he WILL have her arrested if she ever comes near me again.
We get home and none of us had seen Wanda again for several weeks now.
Until 5am today that is.

Mark and I decided to go to 7-Eleven to get some drinks and some donuts for everyone for breakfast, and on our way home, we see this figure standing on the sidewalk.
Just standing there, from a distance, we can't tell if it's a man or woman, just a tall figure standing right in the middle of the sidewalk.
I tell Mark that I'm afraid, someone is just standing there at 5am, why, do they think I have more money because we're carrying two bags and I have my purse?
Are they looking to cause trouble?
Both Mark and I are a bit tense as we keep moving forward, Mark is telling me to stay right next to him, to do what he says if the person starts anything, he has the knife in his pocket, his hand is on it ready to use it should he need to protect us.
Then we both realize that it's Wanda.
As we get within about 5-6 feet, Wanda says "I just want to talk to you!"
I said "No, stay away from me!" Mark told her to leave me alone too, and she was seriously upset, she started yelling that she had to talk to me, she has to heal me!
"Please talk to me! It's really important! I can heal you!"
Mark yells at her to get the fuck away from us, NOW!
He has me by the arm and is pretty much dragging me home and yelling at her to stay away from us, if she follows us, she's going to regret it big time, and she yells one last thing.
"Fine! I'll go this time, but god has commanded me to heal you! I will not stop trying because god has told me to do this! I have to lay my hands upon you to heal you, I have to touch you to heal you! I can and WILL heal you! God commands it!"

So I have a crazy stalker neighbor lady who says she can heal me, that god is telling her that she has to heal me, she has to lay her hands on me, on my neck, head, shoulders, back, and of course, my breasts.
I don't know exactly where on the street she lives, but it's close enough to the street where she can see me walking by, where I go, and if I go to N.'s house, she just stands and waits for me by the fence, and this morning, she must have been awake and saw us go up to the store because there she was, just standing on the sidewalk waiting for me to come back down the street.
So the next time, if there is a next time, I'm dialing 9-1-1, and I'm going to tell them where I am and to hurry, that this crazy woman named Wanda has been stalking me and harassing me for about a month now, physically touching me, not hitting me type of assault, but like false imprisonment type of assault because she wouldn't let me go that first meeting, I had to forcefully pull away, and she just keeps trying, and OMG please help, she's following me and yelling at me right now and I'm disabled, I can't run to get away from her, please hurry.

So there ya go, the crazy Wanda stalker lady story.
I feel so weird even talking about it, a woman is stalking me, trying to touch me, she's obviously nuts, and she scares me, she really does scare me, she just appears outta nowhere and if I'm by myself, I really can't run to get away from her, I honestly don't know what I would do if she catches me again, if she grabs me again.
I would try to break free of course, I would hit her if I had to, but I'm not as strong as I used to be, my punch wouldn't hurt a fly these days, I can't even walk up the street without having to worry about whether or not Wanda the crazy 'I can heal you' stalker lady is out there somewhere waiting for me.

Contact me if you want it, will take PayPal and mail it out as soon as payment is made.
Can give you the 1-800 number and the gift card number to verify the balance on the card.

Sebastian is almost done with school, he will officially be done and out next week because he fast tracked by taking the early exit option, and unlike Mark, he does not want to march with his class.
It's his choice, I'm not going to make him buy a cap and gown and spend 3 hours in a hot stadium doing the graduation like we did with Mark.

Speaking of Mark, we are still waiting to hear from another doctor what we can do for him.
Getting and waiting for referrals is a total pain, I remember it well when I was going through it, it sucks, it's a hurry up and wait game.

My house looks like a tornado blew through it and I'm feeling overwhelmed by it.
I need to hire a maid, if I had the money that is.
And I'm so mad at the stupid cats!
They knocked over my storage chest of beads!
I spent nearly 2 hours on the floor, on my hands and knees, picking up and sorting all of my beads back into their right compartments.
I was in so much pain when it was over with, I spent the next three days laying on the couch again.
I'm just so over having to deal with the pain in my hip and lower back.
I want the nerve burn-off surgery and I want it now!
I'm tired of waiting, I want to do it and have it work because it will mean six to 18 months of no pain at all in my hip and lower back.